Saturday, April 27, 2013

Midwestern Eavesdropping

Thirtysomething woman: "Have you had a cunt punch? It's pretty good."
--Chicago, Rocks, 1301 W. Schubert
Eavesdropper: GMYH

Thursday, April 25, 2013

2 Grams for $40

I am all for punking one's parents, and apparently so is comedian Nathan Fielder.  On his Twitter page, he issued the following challenge:  "Experiment: text your parents 'got 2 grams for $40' then right after 'Sorry ignore that txt. Not for you' Then tweet pic of their response."  Here is a link to a postwith some of the more hilarious results.  Thanks to The Weez for sending the link.  Unfortunately, my mom doesn't use text messages and my dad doesn't have a cell phone with text message capabilities (I kid you not), so I can only appreciate these types of things as an observer.  Enjoy.

Retro Video of the Week: "Playground" by Another Bad Creation

Sorry for late post.  No time for complete sentences.  Subject predicate.  Enjoy ABC.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

American Psycho Musical

I didn't have time to write a Tuesday Top Ten today, but thanks to Ryan for sending me a link to this story about the fact that there is going to be an American Psycho musical. Other than those involving Mormons, uncle fuckers, time warps, or deaf, dumb, blind kids, I'm not a huge fan of musicals.  I have no doubt that list would be expanded to include killing Paul Allen (or Owen, if it's true to the book) with an ax to the face if I am able to make it to London next December or January.  My hope is that there is a musical version of "I like to dissect women, did you know that I'm utterly insane?"  "Murders and Executions" should be a pretty big number.  Anything glorifying Ed Gein would be a nice bonus.  No matter what, I expect it to be a laugh riot.

Monday, April 22, 2013

He Lives . . . And So Do The Rapings

Damn near seven years ago, I brought to your attention the story of a man I named Edgar Bellefontaine.  He stood at the outskirts of Daley Plaza, holding a sign accusing an FBI agent of the ongoing rape of his wife.  The rapings continued through at least September of 2006, and Edgar went so far as to hand out business cards relating to the rapings and "outlaws" who allowed, if not outright encouraged, the rapings, and yet Edgar refused to explain himself.  A few months later, we learned that the rapings had stopped, as they had never been rapings to begin with.  In August 2007, however, the rapings unexpectedly restarted, even as I attempted to take a break from you all to write a book that I finished several years ago but have yet to fully edit or attempt to get published.  We didn't hear from our beloved Edgar for a while, until after Obama got elected, when Edgar set out a personal plea to our President, despite the fact that the Commander in Chief has absolutely no authority over Cook County domestic relations proceedings.

I haven't seen Edgar in the last few years, so I assumed he finally got back together with his wife, Obama spared his child, and FBI agent Chris Saviano was brought to justice.  This morning, I happened to walking past Daley Plaza, and look who greeted me -- with a whistle.
Things appear to have gone downhill for Edgar.  He's still a dad, as you can tell by his "hat."  The top of his sign, which I was unable to capture photographically, declares, "RAPE HQ: FBI," which I think we all knew was the case.  How else would FBI agent Chris Saviano learn how to rape Edgar's wife so effectively while escaping prosecution?  Worse yet, Edgar's food seems to have gone the way of the FBI.  If I am to understand the placard affixed to his chest, a mere 18 days ago -- presumably while Edgar was distracted, making dolls out of the many strands of his ex-wife's hair that he still keeps in a shoe box next to his bare mattress in the middle of the master bedroom in his otherwise empty Gold Coast penthouse -- his food "druged" and raped him.  For those of you not familiar with druging, it's a medieval Flemish torture technique involving a lot of tickling.  Poor guy.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Retro Video of the Week: "Blame It On The Rain" by Milli Vanilli

It may be difficult to imagine, but there was a time when Milli Vanilli was huge.  Every song they put out was a hit.  In the span of about a year and a half, they had five Top 5 songs, including three #1 songs.  They seemed to be everywhere.  I even remember renting a VHS called Milli Vanilli in Motion, which was a compilation of their videos, and going ape shit in my mom's living room, even without the help of Jolt.  And then, as we all know, it all came crashing down in spectacular fashion when it was revealed that they hadn't sung any of their songs.  Actually, I shouldn't say "as we all know" because, I shit you not, I met someone in the last year or so who is about my age who had no idea what happened to Milli Vanilli or that they lip-synced all of their songs.  She is not Amish, either.  Then again, if she was Amish, she probably wouldn't have known about Milli Vanilli in the first place.  Mennonite, maybe.  Amish, hell no.  In retrospect, I shouldn't have even made an Amish reference, not that any of them are going to be reading this.  Live and learn.

Anyway, given the fact that it's been shitting rain all day, there's no better time than the present to blame something on said rain.  Gotta blame it on something.  Penned by songwriting wunderkind Diane Warren, "Blame It On The Rain" was Milli Vanilli's final #1 song, making the Thanksgiving holiday in 1989 a memorable one for everyone.  When watching this, it's amazing that it took as long as it did to figure out that a German guy and a French guy, neither of whose voices were particularly deep, couldn't sing like larger American soul singers.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Tuesday Top Ten: Songs by Boston-Based Bands

Yesterday, some coward(s) decided to ruin what is otherwise already a painful experience by detonating two bombs near the finish line of the Boston Marathon, killing three and injuring over 150 others.  Terrorists are dicks.  Rather than go into some long-winded diatribe about how if everyone had IEDs, things like this would never happen, I will honor the victims of the tragedy the only way I know how:  with a playlist of songs I like.  Here are ten of my favorite songs from Boston-based bands, in alphabetical order by artist.

1.  "No More No More" by Aerosmith
With so many great Aerosmith songs to choose from, this was a difficult choice.  Ultimately, I went with "No More No More" because it's not as well known, and the title of the song seems appropriate given the circumstances.

2.  "Do Me" by Bell Biv DeVoe
Probably one of the best songs of the '90s.

3.  "Smokin'" by Boston
At some point in high school, I declared Boston to be the greatest band in rock and roll history.  It was a stretch, but then again, I had a lot going on hormonally at the time.  I still like Boston, and their debut album is probably, pound for pound, one of the best debut albums in rock history.  "Smokin'" seemed terribly appropriate.

4.  "Just What I Needed" by The Cars
This is my favorite Cars song.  I can't hear it without wanting to sing along.  It is also the only Cars song covered by short-lived Bloomington, Indiana-based punk quintet Cervical Implosion.  True story.

5.  "I'm Shipping Up to Boston" by Dropkick Murphys
There isn't a song in the last ten years that I associate more with Boston than this one.  Wicked.

6.  "Suzie (Wants Her All Day What?)" by Extreme
You didn't think I was going to have a list without a hair band song, did you?  I could have gone with "More Than Words" or "Hole Hearted," but I figured something where everyone in the bands plays would be a better representation of their actual sound.  I chose this one because I know no one named Suzie, or Suz, for that matter.

7.  "That's When I Reach for My Revolver" by Mission of Burma
This is a great post-punk song, with good use of anticipation.  But one must wonder if they had formed within the last several years, would their name be Mission of Myanmar?

8.  "Where Is My Mind?" by The Pixies
There were a couple Pixies songs I could have chosen, but I went with this one because it is eerie and because I have a morbid sense of humor and immediately thought "where is my leg?"  I'm a horrible human being.  When I listen to this song, I'm always amazed it was released in 1988 because it sounds like it should have been released in the early '90s at the height of the grunge era.  Definitely ahead of its time.

9.  "Dirty Water" by The Standells
Even though the Red Sox have essentially ruined this song for everyone else (much like Ohio State fans have done with "Hang on Sloopy"), this is still a really good '60s garage rock song.

10.  "Sinister Minister" by Township
Township is one of my favorite contemporary hard rock bands, and they just play great, straightforward rock and roll.  I went with "Sinister Minister," the first song off of their 2008 eponymous album.  Unfortunately, Grooveshark doesn't have this song, so you will have to click this link to check out the clip on Amazon.

Honorable Mention:  "Feed the Tree" by Belly; "Candy Girl" by New Edition; "The Impression That I Get" by Mighty Mighty Bosstones
Top Ten Songs By Boston-Based Bands by GMYH on Grooveshark

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Sloth Tattoos. Yes, Sloth Tattoos.

If there is one animal everyone should be putting on his or her body forever, it's the sloth.  Despite the facetious nature of the previous statement, there are apparently people who agree with that statement –- at least 23, in fact.  My lovely wife and master of sleight of hand, Jesterio the Magnificent, sent me this link to a post entitled "23 Of The Best Sloth Tattoos of All Time."  She was laughing so hard she was crying when looking at this.  I think the best part is that the sloth's (or at least the tattooed sloth's) logo is "Live slow.  Die whenever."  I also think some of these might be Ewoks.  Not sure if that's better.  Enjoy.

Retro Video of the Week: "Atomic Dog" by George Clinton

This was one of Daughter's favorite videos when she was about 18 months to 2 years old.  I even had her to the point where, if I said, "Why must I be like that?  Why must I chase the cat?," she would respond (as best she could), "Nothin' but the dog in me."  It's probably one of my greatest parenting accomplishments.  That, and when she said, "Daddy, if a bird ate Purdue, it would die."

Monday, April 08, 2013

Tuesday Top Ten: Championship Game Factual Minutiae

Yes, I realize it's Monday, not Tuesday, but the NCAA championship game is tonight, and to deprive you of the statistical knowledge below would be almost as bad as repeatedly chucking basketballs at your players' heads and not getting fired.

After an Elite Eight riddled with blowouts, both Final Four semifinal games were great.  Louisville stole a victory from Wichita State to return to the championship game for the first time since winning the title in 1986.  Meanwhile, Michigan held off Syracuse, clinching its first championship game berth since the Wolverines lost to North Carolina in 1993 in the infamous Chris Webber timeout game.

The championship game tips off at 9:23 Eastern tonight on CBS.  Tomorrow, we will be stricken with the cold, hard reality that we're stuck without college football or basketball for five months.

Here are ten stats related to tonight's championship game.

10.  If Louisville wins, Rick Pitino will become the first coach to lead two different schools to national titles.

9.  This is Michigan's 6th appearance in the championship game, and they only have one title to show for it, winning in 1989, but losing in 1965, 1976, 1992, and 1993.  If the Wolverines lose tonight, their winning percentage in national championship games will be .167, which will be the worst winning percentage among the nine teams that have been to at least 4 national title games (including vacated appearances):

1.  UCLA:  11-2 (.846)
2.  Indiana:  5-1 (.833)
3.  Kentucky:  8-3 (.727)
4.  North Carolina:  5-4 (.556)
5.  Duke:  4-6 (.400)
6.  Kansas:  3-6 (.333)
7.  Georgetown:  1-3 (.250)
8 (tie).  Michigan:  1-4 (.200) (not including tonight's game)
8 (tie).  Ohio State:  1-4 (.200)

8.  The 3 combined national titles between Louisville and Michigan (which will become 4 tonight) is relatively low.  If you look at every year since the tournament began and count all of the national titles (whether it was won that year, prior, subsequent, or later vacated), this will be only the 30th time (out of 74) that the combined national titles of the teams playing for the national title is 4 of fewer. 

2000:  Michigan State (2), Florida (2)
2003:  Syracuse (1), Kansas (3)
2010:  Duke (4)

1952:  Kansas (3)
1955:  San Francisco (2), LaSalle (1)
1961:  Cincinnati (2), Ohio State (1)
1962:  Cincinnati (2), Ohio State (1)
1961:  Loyola (IL) (1), Cincinnati (2)
1974:  NC State (2), Marquette (1)
1988:  Kansas (3)
2004:  Connecticut (3)
2007:  Florida (2), Ohio State (1)
2008:  Kansas (3)
2011:  Connecticut (3)

1939:  Oregon (1), Ohio State (1)
1943:  Wyoming (1), Georgetown (1)
1945:  Oklahoma A&M (2)
1956:  San Francisco (2)
1960:  Ohio State (1), California (1)
1979:  Michigan State (2)
1983:  NC State (2)
1985:  Villanova (1), Georgetown (1)

1941:  Wisconsin (1)
1944:  Utah (1)
1947:  Holy Cross (1)
1950:  CCNY (1)
1954:  LaSalle (1)
1959:  California (1)
1984:  Georgetown (1)
1989:  Michigan (1)

7.    Michigan becomes the 5th different Big Ten school to make it to the championship game since 2000.  No other conference has had more schools reach the championship game during that span.

6.  If Louisville wins the title, Indiana is all but guaranteed to win the title next year.  Both times Louisville won a national title (1980 and 1986), IU won the title the year after.

5.  Louisville's last title was in 1986, and Michigan's only title was in 1989.  Thus, it Louisville wins, it will have had a 27-year span between titles, and if Michigan wins, it will have had a 24-year span between titles.  Only six schools have had spans of more than 20 years between titles (with Kansas doing it twice).  Of course, if Oregon ever wins another championship, God help us all.

36 years:  Kansas (1952-1988)
25 years:  North Carolina (1957-1982)
23 years:  Indiana (1953-1976)
21 years:  Michigan State (1979-2000)
20 years:  Kansas (1988-2008); Kentucky (1958-1978); UCLA (1975-1995)

4.  Michigan is only the third 4-seed to make it to the title game since seeding began in 1979.  Syracuse lost in 1996, and Arizona won in 1997.

3.  Louisville is the 32nd 1-seed to advance to the title game since seeding began in 1979.  #1 seeds are 19-12 in championship games, and Kentucky in 1997 (coached by Rick Pitino) was the last 1-seed to lose in the championship game when facing a team other than another 1-seed (and they lost to a 4-seed).  Here is a breakdown of the 1-seeds in the championship game.

1979:  Indiana State (L)
1982:  North Carolina (W), Georgetown (L)
1983:  Houston (L)
1984:  Georgetown (W)
1985:  Georgetown (L)
1986:  Duke (L)
1987:  Indiana (W)
1988:  Oklahoma (L)
1990:  UNLV (W)
1992:  Duke (W)
1993:  North Carolina (W), Michigan (L)
1994:  Arkansas (W)
1995:  UCLA (W)
1996:  Kentucky (W)
1997:  Kentucky (L)
1999:  Connecticut (W), Duke (L)
2000:  Michigan State (W)
2001:  Duke (W)
2002:  Maryland (W)
2005:  North Carolina (W), Illinois (L)
2007:  Florida (W), Ohio State (L)
2008:  Kansas (W), Memphis (L)
2009:  North Carolina (W)
2010:  Duke (W)
2012:  Kentucky (W)

2.  If Michigan wins, it will be the Big Ten's first title since Michigan State won in 2000.  The 13-year span would be the 11th longest span between titles that a conference has had.  Here are the spans of more than ten years.

1.  36 years:  Big 7/Big 8/Big 12 (1952-1988)
2.  20 years:  SEC (1958-1978); Pac-12/Pac-10/Pac-8/Pacific Coast/AAWU (1975-1995); Big 7/Big 8/Big 12 (1988-2008)
5.  17 years:  Pac-12/Pac-10/Pac-8/Pacific Coast/AAWU (1942-1959); ACC (1957-1974)
7.  16 years:  SEC (1978-1994); Big Ten (1960-1976)
9.  15 years:  Missouri Valley (1946-1961)
10.  14 years:  Big East (1985-1999)
11.  12 years:  Big Ten (1941-1953)
12.  11 years:  Big Ten (1989-2000)

1.  If Michigan wins, I will win my office pool.  So, go Wolverines.  As a result of the preceding sentence, somewhere, my 16-year-old self is vomiting, and not because of Icehouse for once.

Thursday, April 04, 2013

I Killed Weird Al With an Axe to the Face

American Psycho is one of my favorite movies.  Weird Al is one of my favorite song parodists.  Huey Lewis is one of my favorite rock and roll trivia answers.*  Combine all three, and you have a masterpiece.  Thanks to Matt E for sending me the link.

*What well-hung '80s front man played harmonica on "Baby Drives Me Crazy" on Thin Lizzy's legendary 1978 live album, Live and Dangerous?

Retro Video of the Week: "One Shining Moment" by David Barrett

With the NCAA championship game a mere four days away, there is no more appropriate Retro Video of the Week than David Barrett's original version of "One Shining Moment," which debuted after the 1987 championship game, in which IU somehow managed to figure out Syracuse's 2-3 zone, unlike this year.  It's a little bittersweet, considering the expectations IU fans had this year, but here's to what was, what will be, what is, and what should never be.   The song and the montage kick in at about the 1:46 mark.  I should be going to Atlanta tomorrow.  God dammit, Hoosiers.

Tuesday, April 02, 2013

Tuesday Top Ten: Fun Facts About This Year's Final Four

March Madness is a fickle mistress.  One minute she can have you writhing in ecstasy, fulfilling every boyhood fantasy the other eleven months wouldn't dare fulfill, no matter how many cosmos you buy them.  And then the next minute, you're on the floor, yelling the safe word in vain as she rains pointed blows down on you with the 30" riding crop you picked out because you thought, this is something February wouldn't be into.  "Gonzaga!  Gonzaga!  Gonzaga!" you cry out, your muffled screams drowned out by the ball gag in your mouth, the gas mask covering her head, and the Captain Beefheart blaring from the hi-fi.  "She's too much for my mirror" are the last words you hear before you finally succumb to unconsciousness, only to wake up bound and bruised, in the fetal position, leaving yourself to wonder why you put yourself through this and what the hell happened to that $100 that used to be in your wallet.

It was the latter for me last Thursday night, as IU went down in a blaze of horror to Syracuse, playing the worst game of the year and possibly the worst game of the Tom Crean era.  The Orange followed that up with an even more convincing win over Marquette to clinch a Final Four berth.  Meanwhile, Michigan ruined any realistic chance I had in any of my remaining brackets by trouncing Florida, Louisville overcame the worst basketball injury I have ever seen and beat Duke soundly, while new tournament darling, Wichita State, held off a furious Ohio State rally to clinch its first Final Four since the Johnson Administration.

Here are the Final Four game times this Saturday (Eastern).  Both games are on CBS:
(W9) Wichita State vs. (MW1) Louisville – 6:05 p.m.
(S4) Michigan vs. (E4) Syracuse – 8:49 p.m.

As I'm wont to do, I'm going to drop some Final Four statistical knowledge on you.

10 (tie).  Syracuse plays a 2-3 zone.  This is a fact that was apparently lost on anyone who has been the head coach at Marquette since 1999.

10 (tie).  Michigan and Syracuse's matchup marks the first time two #4 seeds have met in the Final Four.

9.  Based on past performance of national titles per Final Four appearances, here is how the teams stack up as far as percentage of national titles per Final Fours.  Not very good:
1.  Syracuse:  25% (1/4)
2.  Louisville:  22% (2/9)
3.  Michigan:  17% (1/6) (I'm including the vacated Final Fours in 1992 and 1993)
4.  Wichita State:  0% (0/1)

8.  The 4 combined national titles (which will become 5 come next Monday) is relatively low.  If you look at every year since the tournament began and count all of the Final Four schools' national titles (whether it was won that year, prior, subsequent, or later vacated), this will be only the 18th time (out of 74) –- and the first time since 1985 -- that the Final Four schools' combined national titles is 4 of fewer. 

1945:  Oklahoma A&M (2), Arkansas (1), Ohio State (1)
1959:  California (1), Cincinnati (2), Louisville (2)
1960:  Ohio State (1), California (1), Cincinnati (2)
1961:  Cincinnati (2), Ohio State (1), Utah (1)
1983:  NC State (2), Louisville (2)
2013:  Louisville (2), Syracuse (1), Michigan (1)

1939:  Oregon (1), Ohio State (1), Villanova (1)
1950:  CCNY (1), NC State (2)
1952:  Kansas (3)
1955:  San Francisco (2), LaSalle (1)

1941:  Wisconsin (1), Arkansas (1)
1943:  Wyoming (1), Georgetown (1)
1944:  Utah (1), Ohio State (1)
1947:  Holy Cross (1), CCNY (1)
1956:  San Francisco (2)
1979:  Michigan State (2)
1985:  Villanova (1), Georgetown (1)

1954:  LaSalle (1)

7.  There are 9 schools with 8 or more Final Fours:  UCLA (18), North Carolina (18), Duke (15), Kentucky (15), Kansas (14), Ohio State (11), Louisville (10), Indiana (8), and Michigan State (8).  This is the 28th year in a row and the 56th year out of the last 57 that at least one of those 9 teams has been in the Final Four.  In fact, one of those teams has been in all but 8 of 74 Final Fours (1941, 1943, 1947, 1950, 1954, 1955, 1956, and 1985). 

6.  Wichita State becomes only the second 9-seed to advance to the Final Four, after Penn did so in 1979, and the first Missouri Valley Conference team since Indiana State in 1979 to make the Final Four.

5.  Wichita State's last Final Four appearance was in 1965.  The 48 years between Final Fours represent the fourth-longest span between Final Fours.  Here are the spans between Final Fours over 30 years (which also includes Michigan this year).  Note that none of these teams won the title upon their return to the Final Four.  Of course, if Duquesne ever makes it back to the Final Four, God help us all.

59 years:  Wisconsin (1941-2000)
56 years:  Stanford (1942-1998); Texas (1947-2003)
51 years:  West Virginia (1959-2010)
48 years:  Wichita State (1965-2013)
44 years:  Oklahoma A&M/Oklahoma State (1951-1995)
41 years:  Oklahoma (1947-1988)
39 years:  Georgetown (1943-1982)
37 years:  Illinois (1952-1989)
36 years:  DePaul (1943-1979)
33 years:  St. John's (1952-1985); Arkansas (1945-1978)
32 years:  Villanova (1939-1971); Utah (1966-1998)
31 years:  Ohio State (1968-1999)

4.  Louisville is the only #1 seed in the Final Four.  This is the fourth year in a row that one or fewer #1 seeds have advanced to the Final Four, and the 14th time since 1985 it has happened.  Based on the past results, Louisville should feel pretty good about its chances, as 7 of the 11 teams who have been the lone #1 seed in the Final Four have gone onto win the title.  Here is a breakdown of how many #1 seeds have advanced to the Final Four each year since 1985.

2013: 1 (Louisville)
2012: 1 (Kentucky*)
2011: 0
2010: 1 (Duke*)
2009: 2 (North Carolina*, Connecticut)
2008: 4 (Kansas*, Memphis**, North Carolina, UCLA)
2007: 2 (Florida*, Ohio State**)
2006: 0
2005: 2 (North Carolina*, Illinois**)
2004: 1 (Duke)
2003: 1 (Texas)
2002: 2 (Maryland*, Kansas)
2001: 2 (Duke*, Michigan State)
2000: 1 (Michigan State*)
1999: 3 (Connecticut*, Duke**, Michigan State)
1998: 1 (North Carolina)
1997: 3 (Kentucky**, North Carolina, Minnesota)
1996: 2 (Kentucky*, Massachusetts)
1995: 1 (UCLA*)
1994: 1 (Arkansas*)
1993: 3 (North Carolina*, Michigan**, Kentucky)
1992: 1 (Duke*)
1991: 2 (UNLV, North Carolina)
1990: 1 (UNLV*)
1989: 1 (Illinois)
1988: 2 (Oklahoma**, Arizona)
1987: 2 (Indiana*, UNLV)
1986: 2 (Duke**, Kansas)
1985: 2 (Georgetown**, St. John's)
**Advanced to championship game

3.  The average seed for this year's Final Four is 4.5, which is only the 4th time since the tournament expanded to 64 teams that the average seed in the Final Four is more than 4 (and the second time in the last three years).

2013: 4.5
2012: 2.25
2011: 6.5
2010: 3.25
2009: 1.75
2008: 1
2007: 1.5
2006: 5
2005: 2.75
2004: 2
2003: 2.25
2002: 2.25
2001: 1.75
2000: 5.5
1999: 1.75
1998: 2.25
1997: 1.75
1996: 2.75
1995: 2.25
1994: 2
1993: 1.25
1992: 3.25
1991: 1.75
1990: 3
1989: 2.25
1988: 2.5
1987: 2.5
1986: 3.75
1985: 3

2.  This marks only the 13th time since 1985 where a team seeded 5 or higher has advanced to the Final Four.  Here are the years in which there have been any teams seeded 5 or higher in the Final Four since 1985. Only twice has a team seeded 5 or higher won it all:

2013: 1: 9-seed Wichita State
2011: 2: 8-seed Butler** and 11-seed VCU
2010: 2: 5-seeds Butler** and Michigan State
2006: 1: 11-seed George Mason
2005: 1: 5-seed Michigan State
2002: 1: 5-seed Indiana**
2000: 3: 5-seed Florida**, 8-seeds North Carolina and Wisconsin
1996: 1: 5-seed Mississippi State
1992: 1: 6-seed Michigan**
1988: 1: 6-seed Kansas*
1987: 1: 6-seed Providence
1986: 1: 11-seed LSU
1985: 1: 8-seed Villanova*
**Advanced to championship game

1.  For the 20th time since 1985, the Final Four features a team that has never won an NCAA title. Since 1985, here are the years in which a Final Four featured at least one team that had never won an NCAA title (at the time of that year's Final Four). Obviously, the earlier you get, the more teams you have:

2013: 1: Wichita State
2011: 2: Butler**, VCU
2010: 2: Butler**, West Virginia
2008: 1: Memphis**
2006: 3: Florida*, George Mason, LSU
2005: 1: Illinois**
2004: 1: Georgia Tech**
2003: 2: Syracuse*, Texas
2002: 2: Maryland*, Oklahoma
2001: 1: Maryland
2000: 1: Florida**
1999: 1: Connecticut*
1997: 2: Arizona*, Minnesota
1996: 2: Massachusetts, Mississippi State
1994: 3: Arizona, Arkansas*, Florida
1991: 1: Duke*
1990: 4: Arkansas, Duke**, Georgia Tech, UNLV*
1989: 4: Duke, Illinois, Michigan*, Seton Hall**
1988: 3: Arizona, Duke, Oklahoma**
1987: 3: Providence, Syracuse**, UNLV
1986: 2: Duke**, LSU
1985: 3: Memphis State, St. John's, Villanova*
**Advanced to championship game

For what little hope I have left in any of my 20+ brackets, go Shockers!