Thanks to Greg Weeser* for the link to the following video. Yes, it is 34 minutes long, but it does feature a whole lotta people injuring themselves and others, proving once again that people are both idiots and hilarious.
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
The Onion as Prophet?
Jamie sent this link to me. It's an Onion article from January 17, 2001 entitled "Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over'." It is painfully accurate in some places. Painfully.
Tuesday Top Ten: Movies I'm Embarrassed I Haven't Seen
I like movies, and I've seen a lot of them. Sure, not as many as a Gene Shalit or a Greg Weeser*, but I've seen my fair share. However, for some reason, there are a handful of movies that I have always meant to see, but just never have. Frankly, it's embarrassing. I'm excluding movies that I've seen most of (such as Shawshank). These aren't in any specific order, except reverse alphabetical by second to last letter.
- Schindler's List (1993). I will likely not make out during this movie when I finally do watch it.
- Poltergeist (1982). I love horror movies, and I've seen just about all of the classics. Somehow, though, Poltergeist has slipped through the cracks. And now DirecTV has mounted a campaign to exploit this failure and humiliate me by using a scene from Poltergeist in one of their ads.
- Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964). Any movie involving a dude riding a nuclear bomb like a horse seems like one that I should see.
- Raging Bull (1980). Scorsese and DeNiro. Why haven't I seen this?
- Fargo (1996). I love the Coen Brothers, and this won Best Picture. What the fuck is wrong with me?
- The Deer Hunter (1978). There were countless times when I was in high school or home from college before I was 21 with nothing to do except hang out with the crew and rent movies. Many times I had The Deer Hunter in my hand at Blockbuster or Hollywood, but put it down in favor of something a bit more germane, such as the horribly disappointing Around the World in Eighty Ways or the hilariously poignant Orgy of the Dead.
- Shrek (2001). I've always been a bit of an ogrephile, and this is supposedly based on the story of an ogre.
- A Few Good Men (1992). I OWN this movie. Worse yet, I've owned it for approximately 10 years. Yet I've never thought to pop it in the VCR (yes, the VCR -- that's how long I've owned it, but not watched it).
- Team America: World Police (2004). I fancy myself a lover of comedies, and this is apparently one of those funny movies.
- Groundhog Day (1993). The fact that I haven't seen this is especially disconcerting given that I have several friends from Woodstock, Illinois, where it was filmed.
New Poll - World Series Teams
Well, no one correctly predicted the teams who would advance to the ALCS and NLCS, so let's see if we can do a little bit better on predicting the World Series teams. As I'm sure you've heard by now, the ALCS features the lovable little Tampa Bay Rays against the annoyingly ever-present Boston Red Sox, while the NLCS pits the team whose fans arrive in the third inning only to leave in the sixth, the LA Dodgers, against the hilarious Philadelphia Phillies. Personally I'm rooting for a Rays/Phillies World Series because I'm sick of the Red Sox and the Dodgers won a crown 20 years ago. Of course, me rooting for the Rays and Phillies ensures a Red Sox/Dodgers finale. Who do you think will go to the World Series? Rays/Phillies, Rays/Dodgers, Red Sox/Phillies, or Red Sox/Dodgers.
Friday, October 03, 2008
Thursday, October 02, 2008
Oh God I'm Runnin'
In honor of the impending Hair Band Friday, I invite you all to check out the following YouTube clip (thanks to Greg Weeser* for the link), which features audio of David Lee Roth's vocals to "Runnin' With the Devil," without the instruments. It's some pretty funny shit, particularly because he doesn't sing the chorus and there are a couple solos here and there, resulting in various periods of dead air with banshee-like shrieks interspersed indiscriminately. Enjoy.
Midwestern Eavesdropping will be back next week.
Midwestern Eavesdropping will be back next week.
Wednesday, October 01, 2008
Soxtoberfest 2008
It is Soxtoberfest once again!
Thanks to the timeliness of Sean "Never Been Any" Riesenbeck and the connections of one or more of the Ramp brothers, I was able to attend last night's tiebreaker game and sit in the Bullpen Bar to boot, along with the aforementioned Sean, Ramps, and a couple other dudes.
In case you missed it, it was a hell of a game, with the Sox winning a 1-0 pitchers' duel to win the AL Central. The Sox had a "black out," wherein everyone attending the game was encouraged to wear black, and black hand towels were distributed to all in attendance. It worked out nicely, I thought. Hopefully they will continue this trend throughout the playoffs.
As you can imagine, Comiskey was abuzz. I don't know if the crowd was more excited when Griffey threw a perfect strike to A.J. to get Michael Cuddyer trying to tag or when Thome hit his 461-foot bomb to center field or when Brian Anderson made a diving catch in center for the last out. My only complaint is that the Sox stopped their victory lap short of the Bullpen Bar, except for D.J. Carrasco, who had no qualms about spraying champagne on all sides of the field.
Then after the game, we headed to Wabash Tap, since it was Tuesday night and all. While there, we struck up a conversation with a scout for the Phillies, in town to scout the Dodgers/Cubs series. He also happened to be the son of former Sox and Phillies manager Jim Fregosi, so that was pretty cool. The next couple hours seemed to fly right by, as I looked at my phone around 1:06 (or so I assume) and realized that I had once again managed to sabotage myself. Personally, I blame Jessie for not being there to yell at me to go home earlier.
As far as my sports-related experiences, last night ranks near the top, along with being on SportsCenter in aught two and winning a Shiner Bock cooler in a long snapping contest at Rocks last Thursday.
Here are some pictures of the "black out," the crowd going nuts, fireworks, D.J. Carrasco carrying a bottle of champagne, and my dog looking like a total badass vampire ninja.
Thanks to the timeliness of Sean "Never Been Any" Riesenbeck and the connections of one or more of the Ramp brothers, I was able to attend last night's tiebreaker game and sit in the Bullpen Bar to boot, along with the aforementioned Sean, Ramps, and a couple other dudes.
In case you missed it, it was a hell of a game, with the Sox winning a 1-0 pitchers' duel to win the AL Central. The Sox had a "black out," wherein everyone attending the game was encouraged to wear black, and black hand towels were distributed to all in attendance. It worked out nicely, I thought. Hopefully they will continue this trend throughout the playoffs.
As you can imagine, Comiskey was abuzz. I don't know if the crowd was more excited when Griffey threw a perfect strike to A.J. to get Michael Cuddyer trying to tag or when Thome hit his 461-foot bomb to center field or when Brian Anderson made a diving catch in center for the last out. My only complaint is that the Sox stopped their victory lap short of the Bullpen Bar, except for D.J. Carrasco, who had no qualms about spraying champagne on all sides of the field.
Then after the game, we headed to Wabash Tap, since it was Tuesday night and all. While there, we struck up a conversation with a scout for the Phillies, in town to scout the Dodgers/Cubs series. He also happened to be the son of former Sox and Phillies manager Jim Fregosi, so that was pretty cool. The next couple hours seemed to fly right by, as I looked at my phone around 1:06 (or so I assume) and realized that I had once again managed to sabotage myself. Personally, I blame Jessie for not being there to yell at me to go home earlier.
As far as my sports-related experiences, last night ranks near the top, along with being on SportsCenter in aught two and winning a Shiner Bock cooler in a long snapping contest at Rocks last Thursday.
Here are some pictures of the "black out," the crowd going nuts, fireworks, D.J. Carrasco carrying a bottle of champagne, and my dog looking like a total badass vampire ninja.
New Poll - LCS Teams
Well, in response to last week's poll, 46% of you correctly predicted that the White Sox would win the AL Central, 0% of you incorrectly predicted that the Twins would win, and 54% of you are jerks. That's all there is to it.
Keeping with the baseball theme, this week's poll asks you fair readers which teams you think will advance to their respective League Championship Series. You have a 1/16 chance of getting it right!
-White Sox, Angels, Dodgers, Phillies
-White Sox, Angels, Dodgers, Brewers
-White Sox, Angels, Cubs, Phillies
-White Sox, Angels, Cubs, Brewers
-White Sox, Red Sox, Dodgers, Phillies
-White Sox, Red Sox, Dodgers, Brewers
-White Sox, Red Sox, Cubs, Phillies
-White Sox, Red Sox, Cubs, Brewers
-Rays, Angels, Dodgers, Phillies
-Rays, Angels, Dodgers, Brewers
-Rays, Angels, Cubs, Phillies
-Rays, Angels, Cubs, Brewers
-Rays, Red Sox, Dodgers, Phillies
-Rays, Red Sox, Dodgers, Brewers
-Rays, Red Sox, Cubs, Phillies
-Rays, Red Sox, Cubs, Brewers
Keeping with the baseball theme, this week's poll asks you fair readers which teams you think will advance to their respective League Championship Series. You have a 1/16 chance of getting it right!
-White Sox, Angels, Dodgers, Phillies
-White Sox, Angels, Dodgers, Brewers
-White Sox, Angels, Cubs, Phillies
-White Sox, Angels, Cubs, Brewers
-White Sox, Red Sox, Dodgers, Phillies
-White Sox, Red Sox, Dodgers, Brewers
-White Sox, Red Sox, Cubs, Phillies
-White Sox, Red Sox, Cubs, Brewers
-Rays, Angels, Dodgers, Phillies
-Rays, Angels, Dodgers, Brewers
-Rays, Angels, Cubs, Phillies
-Rays, Angels, Cubs, Brewers
-Rays, Red Sox, Dodgers, Phillies
-Rays, Red Sox, Dodgers, Brewers
-Rays, Red Sox, Cubs, Phillies
-Rays, Red Sox, Cubs, Brewers
Tuesday Top Ten: Favorite Rolling Stones Songs
This is one day late, due to extenuating circumstances.
The Rolling Stones have been around for somewhere close to seven hundred years, during which they have put out approximately 346 albums, most of which include some pretty damn good music. I think they're hear to stay, and here are my ten (or twelve) favorite Stones songs:
10 (tie). "19th Nervous Breakdown" (single, 1966), "Paint It, Black" (Aftermath, 1966) and "Let It Loose" (Exile on Main St., 1972). I couldn't choose a favorite among these three songs, so I chose all of them. Deal with it. "19th Nervous Breakdown" is a great song about some uppity bi-atch whose dad perfected ways of making ceiling wax, which is a product that I didn't even know existed. "Paint It, Black" has a sitar and shit, and is one of my favorite songs to run to, except that I don't even run. "Let It Loose" is my favorite song off of what may be the Stones' best all-around album.
9. "Dead Flowers" (Sticky Fingers, 1971). Probably the best song about doing heroin in a basement with some chick as a way to get back at your girlfriend while she's at the Kentucky Derby.
8. "The Last Time" (Out of Our Heads, 1965). This is the first Stones song written by Jagger & Richards to hit #1, but it wouldn't be the . . . last . . . time. Ah-thank you!7. "Get Off of My Cloud" (December's Children (And Everybody's), 1965). One of the great drum intros of all time, and a nice message as well.
6. "Little T&A" (Tattoo You, 1981). Sung by Keith Richards, I think the following line -- describing the woman who is the subject of the song -- sums it up: "My tits and ass with soul, baby."
5. "Some Girls" (Some Girls, 1978). A raunchy, bluesy ditty about the ins and outs of courting various types of women.
4. "Salt of the Earth" (Beggars Banquest, 1968). A great song about drinking to the drinkers and the "uncounted heads," with the first verse sung by Keith. (The version on Mixwit is not the original version.)
3. "Moonlight Mile" (Sticky Fingers, 1971). A nice mellow song.
2. "Midnight Rambler" (Let It Bleed, 1969). It should come as no surprise to you that I enjoy a driving blues song with a badass harmonica allegedly based on quotes from the Boston Strangler's confession.
1. "Can't You Hear Me Knocking" (Sticky Fingers, 1971). Best opening riff in rock and roll history? I'd say so. One more than one occasion I've found myself listening to the first 22 seconds of the song over and over again for days on end while smoking meth and watching Leonard Part 6 with the sound off.
The Rolling Stones have been around for somewhere close to seven hundred years, during which they have put out approximately 346 albums, most of which include some pretty damn good music. I think they're hear to stay, and here are my ten (or twelve) favorite Stones songs:
10 (tie). "19th Nervous Breakdown" (single, 1966), "Paint It, Black" (Aftermath, 1966) and "Let It Loose" (Exile on Main St., 1972). I couldn't choose a favorite among these three songs, so I chose all of them. Deal with it. "19th Nervous Breakdown" is a great song about some uppity bi-atch whose dad perfected ways of making ceiling wax, which is a product that I didn't even know existed. "Paint It, Black" has a sitar and shit, and is one of my favorite songs to run to, except that I don't even run. "Let It Loose" is my favorite song off of what may be the Stones' best all-around album.
9. "Dead Flowers" (Sticky Fingers, 1971). Probably the best song about doing heroin in a basement with some chick as a way to get back at your girlfriend while she's at the Kentucky Derby.
8. "The Last Time" (Out of Our Heads, 1965). This is the first Stones song written by Jagger & Richards to hit #1, but it wouldn't be the . . . last . . . time. Ah-thank you!7. "Get Off of My Cloud" (December's Children (And Everybody's), 1965). One of the great drum intros of all time, and a nice message as well.
6. "Little T&A" (Tattoo You, 1981). Sung by Keith Richards, I think the following line -- describing the woman who is the subject of the song -- sums it up: "My tits and ass with soul, baby."
5. "Some Girls" (Some Girls, 1978). A raunchy, bluesy ditty about the ins and outs of courting various types of women.
4. "Salt of the Earth" (Beggars Banquest, 1968). A great song about drinking to the drinkers and the "uncounted heads," with the first verse sung by Keith. (The version on Mixwit is not the original version.)
3. "Moonlight Mile" (Sticky Fingers, 1971). A nice mellow song.
2. "Midnight Rambler" (Let It Bleed, 1969). It should come as no surprise to you that I enjoy a driving blues song with a badass harmonica allegedly based on quotes from the Boston Strangler's confession.
1. "Can't You Hear Me Knocking" (Sticky Fingers, 1971). Best opening riff in rock and roll history? I'd say so. One more than one occasion I've found myself listening to the first 22 seconds of the song over and over again for days on end while smoking meth and watching Leonard Part 6 with the sound off.
... And the Horse You Rode In On
You'll have to forgive me, as I am barely buzzed right now, but I was sitting in the Bullpen Bar tonight and I realized that my beloved White Sox had clinched the AL Central over the new "hitless wonders," the Minneapolis Twins of Minnesota. I have no business being awake right now, other than the fact that I am excited for my Sox and hoping they can beat 4 different teams in 4 games. I love you all, other than "anonymous," as he or she is probably a Twins fan and a figment of my imagination. Congrats Adam and Jennifer. Love you guys. GMYH, out!
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