Midwestern Eavesdropping

Thirtysomething female when discussing lost iron with husband:  "I don't know how to use an iron, so I would never lose one."
--Chicago
Eavesdropper:  The Loose-Lipped Lithuanian

And while this technically isn't Midwestern Eavesdropping, it was too good not to share, as it's about the most Chicago thing I've seen.  A traffic sign above I-90 said:

NO TEXTING

NO SPEEDING

NO KETCHUP

--Chicago, Kennedy Expressway
Eavesdropper:  GMYH

As always, if you overhear something funny or ridiculous (or that can be taken completely out of context), email it to gmyhblog@yahoo.com, along with the location you heard it and your preferred eavesdropping handle, for inclusion in the next exciting edition of Midwestern Eavesdropping.