It's The Most Wonderful Time of the Beer: 2018 Edition

It's that time of year again, when the beer is as dark as the five o'clock sky, and just as delicious.  Winter is my favorite beer season.  After a couple years off, I will once again be engaging in that zesty little weight-gaining enterprise I call It's The Most Wonderful Time of the Beer -- a daily look at a different winter beer throughout December.

This year, there will be a slight twist.  You see, I received a most wonderful gift.  My wife and children, lovable enablers that they are, gave me a beer advent calendar from local beer shop (or is it a shoppe?), Bottles and Cans.  

I've never had a beer advent calendar before, and I gotta tell ya, I love the idea.  Beginning tomorrow, each morning until the fabricated anniversary of the birth of Jesus, as my kids are tearing into their mediocre little chocolate Santas, teddy bears, stockings, and the like from their own advent calendars, I will be enjoying a new beer.  I have no idea what lies within, and I don't plan on taking a peek, but you can guarantee I'm going to enjoy this.

Like in years past, I'll report back to you via this here blog with a non-technical description of each beer and the following information:
-Name
-Brewery
-Location
-ABV (if available)
-IBU (if available)
-"Good for drinking if" comment
-Rating (out of five stars, by quarter star increments)

As in years past, I may not get a chance to post every day, so I may have a few "catch up" posts, where multiple beers are reviewed.  Here's to hoping my advent calendar is long on malt and short on hops.

Hair Band Friday - 11/30/18

1.  "Get In The Ring" by Guns N' Roses


2.  "Big Trouble" by David Lee Roth


3.  "Take Your Whiskey Home" by Van Halen


4.  "Hangin' On" by Winger


5.  "The Angel Song" by Great White


6.  "The Last Mile" by Cinderella


7.  "You're Too Bad" by FireHouse


8.  "Hellraiser" by Ozzy Osbourne


9.  "Smoke Signals" by Extreme


10.  "Crazy Nites" by Danger Danger

Midwestern Eavesdropping

Thirtysomething female, discussing height in sexual partners:  "When you're layin' down, it doesn't matter."
--Chicago, Ballast Point, 212 N. Green St.
Eavesdropper:  The Loose-Lipped Lithuanian

Elementary school teacher, during a guided reading to the class:  "Look at all the Ds.  Find all the Ds.  When you find the D, touch it."
--Chicago
Eavesdropper:  Rockford Peach

As always, if you overhear something funny or ridiculous (or that can be taken completely out of context), email it to gmyhblog@yahoo.com, along with the location you heard it and your preferred eavesdropping handle, for inclusion in the next exciting edition of Midwestern Eavesdropping.

Retro Video of the Week: "Metal Health (Bang Your Head)" by Quiet Riot

This week marked a huge milestone in heavy metal music.  Monday was the 35th anniversary of the day Quiet Riot's third studio album, Metal Health, topped the Billboard album charts, becoming the first heavy metal album to do so.  While another heavy metal album (if you can call Van Halen's 5150 "heavy metal") didn't top the charts for another two and a half years, Metal Health showed radio stations, consumers, and record companies that heavy metal was a viable genre that was here to stay.  It also shined the spotlight on the Sunset Strip and Los Angeles as the place to find up-and-coming hard rock and metal bands.

The most famous song off of Metal Health is the band's cover of Slade's "Cum On Feel The Noize," which hit #5 on the Billboard Hot 100.  Other hits off of the album were "Slick Black Cadillac," which was an MTV staple and reached #32 on the Billboard Mainstream Rock chart, and the title track.  Whether you call it "Metal Health," "Bang Your Head," "Metal Health (Bang Your Head)," or "Bang Your Head (Metal Health)," it was the band's second Top 40 song on the Billboard Hot 100, reaching #31, and it is a metal classic.

I highly recommend the 2015 documentary about the band, Quiet Riot: Well Now You're Here, There's No Way Back, which is taken from a lyric in "Metal Health" and chronicles the history of the band and drummer Frankie Banalli's attempts (sometimes successful, other times not) to get the band back together after the 2007 death of lead singer Kevin DuBrow.

Interesting tidbit:  Kevin DuBrow's younger brother is reality TV plastic surgeon and star of Botched, Dr. Terry DuBrow.

Tuesday Top Ten: Favorite Songs on The White Album

This past week (the 22nd in the UK and the 25th in the US) marked the 50th anniversary of the release of the Beatles' eponymous ninth album, known more widely as "The White Album."  To celebrate, the band recently released a sprawling reissued and remastered box set of the album, produced/remastered by Giles Martin -- son of late Beatles producer Sir George Martin -- and featuring 50 previously unreleased recordings and the infamously elusive Esher demos, reportedly recorded at George Harrison's house when the band was in the beginning stages of songwriting for the album.

Arguably the greatest double album ever made, The White Album is an icon.  It's instantly recognizable.  It's what Fletch asked for when he was in the Records Room.  It's my favorite Beatles album.  I think the reason I like it so much is that the songs are so diverse.  On the four sides, you'll hear 30 songs in various genres -- pop, psychedelic rock, blues, avante garde, hard rock, schmaltz, proto metal, acoustic ballads, and songs that I don't dare categorize (like what the fuck is "Piggies?").  This was probably the album I listened to the most during my junior year of college -- a wonderful, carefree time when I was old enough to drink legally, but just far enough away from graduating to feel any modicum of responsibility.

I haven't yet acquired the new box set, although I am hoping Santa Claus is reading this.  For the time being, all I have is the original.  Of the thirty songs on the album, here are my ten favorite, in the order they appear on the album.

1. "While My Guitar Gently Weeps"
George's songwriting was really coming into its own by this point, and "While My Guitar Gently Weeps" is one of the better songs on this album, which says a lot because, you know, John Lennon and Paul McCartney were also in the band.  Eric Clapton famously plays the lead guitar on the track (uncredited).


2. "Happiness Is a Warm Gun"
The song immediately following "While My Guitar Gently Weeps" is my favorite Beatles song.  It's like a mini rock opera in and of itself.  The song starts with kind of a brooding, acid-inspired hard rockish section.  Then completely changes in the short middle section, with the phrase "Mother Superior jumped the gun" repeated.  And finally, it breaks into the last part, an ode to doo wop and soul, oozing with sexual innuendo.


3. "I'm So Tired"
"I'm So Tired" is probably the Beatles song I have most often sung/quoted in my own head over the years because, well, I get tired sometimes.  And when I do, I say to myself, "I'm so tired," and then the next thing I know, I'm cursing Sir Walter Raleigh.  Also, if you are really tired and hope to sleep, I will say that John's suggestion that you have another cigarette is not conducive to sleep.


4. "Why Don't We Do It in the Road?"
It's short, simple, and direct, much like it's inspiration, when Paul saw two monkeys shamelessly banging on a street in Rishikesh, India, during the Beatles' famous meditation retreat with the Maharishi.


5. "Yer Blues"
Lest you think the Beatles couldn't sing the blues, ladies and gentlemen, I present John Lennon tearing his heart and vocal chords out.


6. "Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Monkey"
So yes, there are at least two songs on The White Album inspired by monkeys.  I don't even have a monkey, so I can't comment on whether he or she would be forthright.


7. "Sexy Sadie"
John Lennon's diss track aimed at the Maharishi has personal meaning for me.  In college, I had a black '89 Honda Accord that I named Sexy Sadie.  On a late January Sunday afternoon in 1999, I was driving back to Bloomington after a weekend visiting some friends at Eastern Illinois.  It was raining.  I was on SR 46, maybe 20 miles outside of Bloomington, when I was taking slow curve.  To be clear, the curve was slow, but my driving was not.  I started to hydroplane, crossed the center line and the other lane, slid across a wet field of grass sideways, jumped a small creek, before slamming into a tree and totaling my car.  I was listening to The White Album on my Discman, plugged into my tape player, as was the style back then.  The song that was playing when I crashed?  "Sexy Sadie."  Thankfully, I came out unscathed, as did the Discman and the White Album. In fact, in a fit of adrenaline-driven machismo, I yelled, "is that all you got?!" to no one in particular.


8. "Helter Skelter"
Did Paul invent heavy metal with this song?  Maybe.  I discussed this song -- and it's rather unfortunate interpretation by Charles Manson -- in depth last month during Rocktober, so I will direct you to that post for further discussion.


9. "Revolution 1"
This is one of two versions of this song.  The album version ("Revolution 1") is the slower, more acoustic, and more bluesy version, recorded a few weeks before the more famous, more electric, and more uptempo version ("Revolution") that was eventually released as the B-side to "Hey Jude."  Other than the differences in the music, the most noticeable difference is that, in this version, John changes one of the lyrics to add an "in" after talking about destruction ("you can count me out, in"). That's some sneaky ass shit right there.


10. "Cry Baby Cry"
This is a slower song that I've always liked.  Also, I had a friend in college who was a member of Pi Beta Phi, so pretty much whenever I hear Pi Beta Phi, I sing it in my head in the style of "Cry Baby Cry."

New Book: Hidden History of Lincoln Park by Patrick Butler

Sorry for the posting hiatus.  I was too busy with work, turkeys, and the like.

A couple weeks ago, I finished reading Different Seasons by Stephen King.  Different Seasons was released in 1982, and it is comprised of four novellas.  Three of of them have been made into major motion pictures, and the fourth is apparently going to be made into a movie within the next two years.  I liked all of them.  Here are the novellas:
-"Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption" is, of course, the basis for The Shawshank Redemption, which I've never seen in full, but I know the premise and I know how it ends.  The novella is good.  It's about perseverance, but you already knew that.
-"Apt Pupil" was the basis for the 1998 film of the same name.  It's about a teenage boy who discovers that a nazi war criminal (now in his 80s) is living under an assumed name in his California town.  The boy and the man become acquaintances, bringing out the worst in each other.  
-"The Body" was adapted into the 1986 classic Stand By Me, which I haven't seen in forever, so basically all I remembered was the infamous puking scene.  The premise is that four twelve-year-olds in rural Maine in 1959 hear about the location of the dead body of a kid from another town, so they head off to find it.
-"The Breathing Method" is scheduled to be adapted into a film in 2020.  It's about a strange and secretive men's club in New York City, where the members occasionally tell weird or macabre stories.  It is the story within the story that an elderly club member bestows on the membership that was definitely the most grisly and interesting part of the four novellas for me.  I'm interested to see the film adaptation of "The Breathing Method," as there is some pretty gruesome stuff going on.

I have since started reading Hidden History of Lincoln Park by Patrick Butler.  Since I've lived in various locations in that neighborhood for over a decade, I figured I should probably know a little bit more about the history.  Everyone knows about John Dillinger being shot in the alley next to to the Biograph Theater on Lincoln Avenue, or the St. Valentine's Day Massacre at what is now an empty yard on Clark, between Armitage and Webster, but there is a lot more (good and bad).  Hell, I've already learned about some local bars that I've visited many times that are haunted.

Books Read in 2018:
-How Music Works by David Byrne
-But What If We're Wrong?: Thinking About the Present As If It Were the Past by Chuck Klosterman
-Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore
-My Cross to Bear by Gregg Allman with Alan Light
-Different Seasons by Stephen King

Hair Band Friday - 11/16/18

1.  "Seven Sundays" by Extreme


2.  "Outta Love Again" by Van Halen


3.  "Way Cool Jr." by Ratt


4.  "Believe In Love" by Scorpions


5.  "Wheels of Fire" by L.A. Guns


6.  "Desperately" by Slaughter


7.  "Time For Change" (demo) by Mötley Crüe


8.  "Love Me" by Tesla


9.  "Wasted Generation" by Steel Dragon


10.  "Thrill That Kills" by BulletBoys

Retro Video of the Week: "Good" by Better Than Ezra

Friday will mark the silver anniversary of the release of Better Than Ezra's second studio album, Deluxe, which was the band's only platinum album and their highest-charting album, reaching #35 on the Billboard album charts.  If you know any Better Than Ezra song, it's likely "Good," which was an alternative rock radio staple.  It was the group's most successful song, hitting #30 on the Billboard Hot 100, #1 on the Billboard Modern Rock Tracks chart, and #3 on the Billboard Mainstream Rock chart.  It's a great song (not just good!), and when I hear it, I'm immediately transported back to high school, for better or worse.

Hair Band Friday - 11/9/18

1.  "Action" by Def Leppard


2.  "Shot In The Dark" by Ozzy Osbourne


3.  "So Many Tears" by Dokken


4.  "Goin' Home Tonight" by White Lion


5.  "Steeler" by Judas Priest


6.  "Sure Feels Good to Me" by Warrant


7.  "You're Crazy" (acoustic) by Guns N' Roses


8.  "Hold Me Tight" by Scorpions


9.  "Shake Me" by Cinderella


10.  "Could This Be Magic?" by Van Halen

Midwestern Eavesdropping

Twentysomething male leaving concert venue after seeing Ghost in concert:  "I know I'm Mexican, but that was a lot of fun."

--Chicago, Aragon Ballroom

Eavesdropper:  H Dawg

Retro Video of the Week: "Jump (For My Love)" by The Pointer Sisters

Thirty-five years ago yesterday, The Pointer Sisters released their tenth studio album, Break Out.  After achieving success during the '70s and early '80s, the genre-bending siblings were down to a trio by this point.  Break Out would be the group's most successful album, both on the Billboard album charts (where it peaked at #8) and from a sales standpoint (going triple platinum in the U.S.).  

All six of the singles released from the album charted, doing no worse than #48 on the Billboard Hot 100:  "I Need You" (#48), "Automatic" (#5), "Jump (For My Love)" (#3), "I'm So Excited" (remix) (#9), "Neutron Dance" (#6), and "Baby Come and Get It" (#44).

I'm going with "Jump (For My Love)" because it's the first song I think of when I hear "The Pointer Sisters."  As a six-year-old in 1984, I remember being somewhat amazed that there were two really huge songs called "Jump" (the other being Van Halen's, of course).  Both were massive at the roller rinks, on Top 40 radio, and on MTV.  And the "(For My Love)" was actually added to the title of The Pointer Sisters' song to differentiate it from the Van Halen song.  "Jump (For My Love)" got all the way up to #3 on the Billboard Hot 100, not to mention Top 10 in several other countries. It would be the group's last Top 5 hit on the Billboard Hot 100.  With that, here is June Pointer on lead vocals, backed by sisters Anita and Ruth, giving you a little slice of '80s pop pie.

Tuesday Top Ten: Halloween Costumes (2018 Edition)

Last Wednesday was the best holiday of the year.  As is the custom, the Saturday before, I had a Halloween party.  I went as Marilyn Manson.  Needless to say, I creeped a lot of people out, which I completely expected.  What I didn't expect was how many women would grab my boobs.  Finally, maybe women can see things from a man's perspective.  Look at your game, girl.

And, of course, on Halloween night, after trick-or-treating with a gumball machine, an archer, and an apparently sassy T Rex, I put on a $4.99 white mask and my trusty black hooded reaper's robe, and handed out not nearly enough candy to neighborhood children while listening to doom metal and drinking goat's blood.

But let's get to the fun stuff.  Here are the ten best costumes I saw this year, whether in person, on Al Gore's internet, or on Facebook.  These are in no particular order.

1.  Race car driver
With a real racing suit and helmet, complete with a straw and everything.  What you don't see is the Indy Car she parked outside my house.

2.  Boxer (aka "The Velvet Puma")
The black eye is not real.  The sling is.  Good use of an injury for a costume.

3.  Doc Holliday
The picture is a little dark, like someone just walked all over your grave.

4.  Napoleon Dynamite
And, more importantly, he had his lines down.  Gosh!

5.  Lumbergh and Milton from Office Space
The Initech mugs were a really nice touch.

6.  Trumpkin
I love a good play on words.

7.  Eleven and Hopper from Stranger Things
More like the right side up.

8.  Rick and Ilsa from Casablanca
Of all the Halloween parties in all the towns in all the world, they walk into mine.

9.  Two Supreme Court Justices
He likes beer.  She could kick his ass.

10.  Burning Man goers
The nice part is that, in Chicago, he'll be able to wear that bear hat/shall and she'll be able to wear those boots all winter long.

Hair Band Friday - 11/2/18

1.  "Let Me Put My Love Into You" by AC/DC


2.  "Poor Boy Blues" by Poison


3.  "Madalaine" by Winger


4.  "Tell The World" by Ratt


5.  "Cherokee" by Europe


6.  "Bark at the Moon" by Ozzy Osbourne


7.  "Animal Magnetism" by Scorpions


8.  "Psycho Love" by Skid Row


9.  "Yesterdays" by Guns N' Roses


10.  "Merry-Go-Round" (live) by Mötley Crüe