Tuesday Top Ten: Hair Band One Hit Wonders

Back in May 2014, I did a Tuesday Top Ten of Hair Band One Hit Wonders.  Because I'm somewhat busy today, I'm going to take on that topic again, although this time I'm going to take a little bit of a different approach this time and go with the ten highest-charting hair band one hit wonders, rather than my personal opinion on what the ten best hair band one hit wonders were.  Thus, this post will be similar to (and copy and paste much of) my previous post, but there will be a few differences -- most notably that I have removed Ratt's "Round and Round," since Ratt technically had two Top 40 songs.

As you know, I love hair band music, but my love is not limited to the Bon Jovis, Def Leppards, and Mötley Crües of the world.  The '80s were a bastion for one hit wonders, and the hair band genre had its share -- although not as many as you might think.

First, I think it's gravely important that we define what constitutes a one hit wonder.  It's a relatively fluid concept, but generally, a one hit wonder is a band or musician that had one and only one song that made it into the Top 40 of the Billboard Hot 100 charts.  I think that's a fair and objective standard.  In my mind, if Casey Kasem (or Shadoe Stevens) didn't play your song on American Top 40, you didn't have a hit.

This was actually much tougher than I expected.  There were a lot of bands who had multiple Top 40 hits who I only thought would have had one.  After all, hair bands were quite popular in the mid '80s through the early '90s.  Bands like Bad English (3), Cinderella (5), Damn Yankees (2), Europe (4), Extreme (2), FireHouse (4), Lita Ford (2), Great White (2), Mr. Big (3), Nelson (4), Quiet Riot (2), Ratt (2), Skid Row (2), Slaughter (3), Tesla (2), Warrant (5), White Lion (2), Whitesnake (4), Winger (3), Vixen (2) all made it into the Top 40 more than one, and several of them had multiple Top 10s at that.  Who knew Vixen had two Top 40 hits, other than, say, the members of Vixen?

And, on the other hand, there were a lot of bands who I thought would have had a Top 40 song that had none, but perhaps I am retroactively overvaluing the popularity of the likes of W.A.S.P., Dokken, Dio, Britny Fox, Jackyl, and BulletBoys.

As a result of these issues, I had to fudge a couple of the entries on the list and expand my scope to the Top 50.  With that, here are the top ten hair band one hit wonders, in reverse order by highest chart position on the Billboard Hot 100, with the song's highest peak on the charts in parentheses.  And, of course, following each song is the video because you couldn't have a hit song in the '80s without a video.

Just missed:  "Bang Bang" by Danger Danger (#49); "Wait For You" by Bonham (#55); "Hey You" by The Quireboys (#53)

10.  "Fly High Michelle" by Enuff Z'Nuff (#47)

Enuff Z'Nuff was an Illinois-based glam band that often sounded more Beatles-influenced than metal-influenced.  A friend of mine that I grew up with claimed at one point that the band's drummer grew up on his block, and I have no reason to believe or not believe that.  "Fly High Michelle" was the band's biggest hit, topping out at #47 in 1990.  It's the only song on the list that didn't crack the Top 40.

9.  "The Ballad of Jayne" by L.A. Guns (#33)

The original incarnation of L.A. Guns has the infamous distinction of being the "Guns" in Guns N' Roses, when L.A. Guns (featuring Tracii Guns) merged with Hollywood Rose (featuring Axl Rose, Duff McKagan, and Izzy Stradlin).  Of course, Guns was replaced in GNR by Slash, and then he reformed L.A. Guns shortly thereafter.  They put out a couple pretty good glam/sleaze metal albums that cracked the Top 50 of Billboard's album charts, and like so many other hair bands on this list, their highest-charting song was their ballad, appropriately titled "The Ballad of Jayne."  I have always liked this song, and for one reason or another, I think it's better than most hair band ballads.

8.  "Turn Up the Radio" by Autograph (#29)

"Turn Up the Radio" is a great, fist-pumping song with a sing-along chorus, and as I learned today, guitarist Steve Lynch won 1985's "Guitar Solo of the Year" award from Guitar Player Magazine for this song.  I used to see this video now and then on VH1 Classic's hard rock and metal video show, Metal Mania (RIP, VH1 Classic), as well as the band's video for their song "Blondes in Black Cars," a song that could only have been made in the '80s.

7.  "House of Pain" by Faster Pussycat (#28)

Faster Pussycat was fronted by Taime Downe, who co-owned the '80s Sunset Strip club The Cathouse with Riki Rachtman (of MTV Headbangers Ball fame), and "House of Pain" was the band's only charting single.  It's a heartfelt power ballad.

6.  "Honestly" by Stryper (#23)

Who says glam metal can't include some Jesus loving?  Stryper was, as far as I know, the only Christian hair band that had any measure of success.  "Honestly," off the band's 1987 platinum-selling album To Hell With The Devil, was their highest-charting song, and it is a pretty sappy ballad.  I much prefer the title track, but "Honestly" does provide at least a glimpse into lead singer Michael Sweet's vocal range.

5.  "We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister (#21)

Give how ubiquitous "We're Not Gonna Take It" has become over the years (I think most college pep bands have had this in their regular rotation at some point), I sometimes forget that it was Twisted Sister's only Top 40 hit.  This is not only a top hair band one hit wonder, but has been ranked as the #21 overall one hit wonder of all-time by VH1.  The video is also a classic that my kids now love to watch. Neidermeyer: what a dick.

4.  "I'll Never Let You Go" by Steelheart (#14)

This was the only one hit wonder that made my list of Top Ten Hair Band Power Ballads, and with good reason.   Lead singer Miljenko "Michael" Matijevic hits notes that most female opera singers can only dream about.  Matijevic also provided the vocals for Mark Wahlberg's character in the 2001 guilty pleasure film Rock Star, which I could watch a thousand times and not get sick of.

3.  "Love Is On The Way" by Saigon Kick (#12)

I have always assumed Saigon Kick is a hair band, based on the fact that their only hit, "Love Is On The Way" was a ballad in the style of other hair bands' ballads at the time.  Then again, the extent of my knowledge of Saigon Kick is relatively limited.  Anyway, this song was pretty big, reaching #12 on the charts in 1992, at the tail end of the Hair Band Era.

2.  "Don't Close Your Eyes" by Kix (#11)

Baltimore-based Kix struck a chord (pun intended) in 1989 with their anti-suicide power ballad "Don't Close Your Eyes."  Like many hair bands (see also Extreme and Mr. Big), they are unfortunately and unfairly mainly known for their ballad, but most of their stuff is a lot harder rocking.  While I have never seen Kix live, they are apparently a legendarily good live band, so if you get the chance, check them out.

1.  "Silent Lucidity" by Queensrÿche (#9)

When I made my original list, honestly, I didn't even think about Queensrÿche because I assumed they had more than one Top 40 song. Apparently, I put too much faith in "Jet City Woman." But "Silent Lucidity" was the band's only charting single -- and the highest-charting hair band one hit wonder.