Tuesday Top Ten: '00s Social Distancing Songs

Prior decades:
-Top Ten Pre-1960s Social Distancing Songs
-Top Ten '60s Social Distancing Songs
-Top Ten '70s Social Distancing Songs
-Top Ten '80s Social Distancing Songs
-Top Ten '90s Social Distancing Songs

We've reached the new millennium in our weekly look at COVID-19-appropriate songs from each of the past seven decades.  What a shitty decade the aughts were.  First, the Supreme Court elected W as president, which I think was the turning point from the relatively copacetic '90s to the downfall of discourse and the intransigent division among political parties and beliefs that is still clearly an open wound twenty years later.  As if that wasn't bad enough, we had the tech bubble burst, 9/11, the Iraq War, the Space Shuttle Columbia crash, W got reelected, the 2004 tsunami in the Indian Ocean, MTV stopped playing music videos, Hurricane Katrina, the rise and fall of MySpace, Darfur, SARS, H1N1, Michael Jackson died, and top it all off, the housing bubble burst, plunging the U.S. into its worst economic downturn since the Great Depression.

Of course, it wasn't all bad.  There was the White Sox's 2005 World Series win, The OC, and Obama getting elected.  I got married, and welcomed my first child into the world.  And we did have some decent music to get us through.  For all of the shitty things that were going on, musicians didn't stop doing what they do, and there were a lot of great advancements, from the garage rock revival to hip hop (and particularly, Southern hip hop) to indie rock to pop to the end of the boybands to nu metal to emo to the resurgence of Bon Jovi to the rebirth of the music festival to the shift from CDs to digital music, completely changing how we listen to, purchase, and absorb music.

Without belaboring the point any further, here are my top ten '00s songs that relate to social distancing, COVID-19, and what we are all going through, in alphabetical order by artist.  As always, I tried to go with songs that best fit the theme, and not necessarily my favorite songs or the "best" songs.  And as always, only one song per artist.  I gave you a bonus song because you deserve it, or at least that's what you think.  Welcome to the COVID, bitch.

1.  "This House Is a Circus" by Arctic Monkeys

Anyone who has school-age children and has had to deal with distance learning, class Zooms, and trying to get your kids to sit down and do some damn work at home instead of watching TV or playing video games -- and why do I smell shit? -- can relate to the very apt first line of this song:  "This house is a circus, berserk as fuck."

2.  "Hospital Beds" by Cold War Kids

One of the biggest reasons for social distancing and stay-at-home orders was to make sure that hospitals had enough beds for both those with COVID-19 and non-COVID-19 patients.  Based on what I've read in the last couple days, it worked, as shutdowns prevented an estimated 60 million coronavirus cases in the U.S.  I'd venture to guess that's more than the number of hospital beds in the country.

3.  "Down with the Sickness" by Disturbed

I featured this as a Retro Video of the Week in early March, before everything started to get shut down and we really started flattening the curve.  Thanks to shutdowns, masks, and social distancing, the sickness has gone down somewhat, and make no mistake about it:  we need to stay vigilant until there is a vaccine.  So suck it up, and let's continue to take COVID-19 down.

4.  "Multitude Of Casualties" by The Hold Steady

With over 7 million confirmed cases worldwide and over 400,000 deaths, I think that qualifies as a multitude of casualties.

5.  "Contagious" by Avril Lavigne

COVID-19 is contagious, even if you aren't exhibiting symptoms.  Wear a mask.

6.  "The Distances from Everyone to You" by Louis XIV

During social distancing and stay-at-home orders, we have all come to realize that the distances from everyone to you are both great and small at the same time.  While you may not see your neighbor down the street for months, thanks to Zoom, Teams, and the like, we have been able to connect with friends and family members that we may not always get the chance to see face-to-face, so if nothing else, quarantining has shown that the distances between everyone and you can be small, even if those distances are virtual.

7.  "Harder To Breathe" by Maroon 5

This was one of the first '00s songs I thought of when I started making a COVID-19-related playlist.  By all accounts, shortness of breath is one of the telltale symptoms of the coronavirus.  So if it's getting harder and harder to breathe, please seek medical attention.

8.  "Toxic" by Britney Spears

This is another song that came to mind pretty quickly when making the list.  The taste of your lips could be toxic if you have the virus, so, you know, don't make out with strangers.

9.  "Alone, Together" by The Strokes

One of the lesser-known songs of The Strokes' fantastic 2001 debt album, Is This It, little did the band know that nineteen years later, it would be the perfect title for a global pandemic.  As discussed above, while we are all definitely more alone than usual, we have also been in this together, which has hopefully brought us a little bit closer.

10.  "Breathe In Breathe Out" by Kanye West (feat. Ludacris)

Before he was Yeezy, Yeezus, or Ye, he was just a guy named Kanye West making great hip hop music.  "Breathe In Breathe Out," which features Ludacris, was on Kanye's 2004 debut album The College Dropout, and it offers a message applicable to COVID-19.  If you can breathe in and breathe out, then that's a good sign.

11.  "I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself" by The White Stripes

For me, the '00s was The White Stripes' decade.  Their 2003 album Elephant was amazing, top to bottom.  One of my favorite songs on the album is their cover of the Burt Bacharach and Hal David-penned "I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself," which was a hit in the '60s for both Dusty Springfield and Dionne Warwick.  Meg and Jack took it to new heights, with the quiet verses and wailing choruses.  The song is all about planning things with others and not knowing what to do with oneself when those fall through.  We've all been there over the past few months, whether it's been as simple as having to cancel birthday party plans to something as big as having to postpone a wedding or a vacation.  And with all this time at home, I've found myself saying "I just don't know what to do with myself."  Then I realize I have three kids, so there's always shit to clean up. 

Honorable mention:  "Go It Alone" by Beck; "Fever In My Blood" by Black Diamond Heavies; "I Cry Alone" by The Black Keys; "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry" by Johnny Cash; "Breathless" by The Corrs; "Get Your Hands off My Woman" by The Darkness; "Stuck in a Rut" by The Darkness; "Go Home, Get Down" by Death From Above 1979; "Bodies" by Drowning Pool; "High Lonesome" by The Gaslight Anthem; "Don't Let Me Explode" by The Hold Steady; "Sequestered in Memphis" by The Hold Steady; "Stay Positive" by The Hold Steady; "Happy Alone" by Kings of Leon; "Slow Night, So Long" by Kings of Leon; "Separate And Ever Deadly" by The Last Shadow Puppets; "Hands Clean" by Alanis Morissette; "So Fresh, So Clean" by OutKast; "Leave Me Alone" by Razorlight; "Lonesome Day" by Bruce Springsteen; "Toxicity" by System Of A Down; "Girl, You Have No Faith In Medicine" by The White Stripes; "There's No Home For You Here" by The White Stripes; "The Nurse" by The White Stripes; "Far Away" by Wolfmother