Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Tuesday Top Ten: Noncharting Songs by Successful Hair Bands

Last week, we took a look at the Top Ten Hair Band One Hit Wonders.  This week, I'm going with the opposite approach, answering the question I know you've been asking this whole month:  "GMYH, I know the big hits, but what in holy hell are the best noncharting songs by the most successful hair bands?"  You asked, fair reader, and you deserve an honest, well-thought-out responsive post using an arbitrary metric created by a man who once farted so horribly at a Nashville honky tonk that he had to buy fifteen shots of Fireball for his friends and strangers to make up for the temporary stench.  My god, that was awful.

So here's how this is going to work.  We have to have some relatively objective method by which to judge which bands are "successful."  To that end, I have come up with the following scoring system for each band or artist.

10 points:  #1 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #1 album on Billboard 200
9 points:  #2-10 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #2-5 album on Billboard 200
8 points:  #11-20 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #6-10 album on Billboard 200
7 points:  #21-30 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #11-15 album on Billboard 200
6 points:  #31-40 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #16-20 album on Billboard 200
5 points:  #41-45 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #21-25 album on Billboard 200
4 points:  #46-50 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #26-30 album on Billboard 200
3 points:  #51-60 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #31-35 album on Billboard 200
2 points:  #61-75 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #36-40 album on Billboard 200
1 point:  #76-100 song on Billboard Hot 100 or #41-50 album on Billboard 200

Because there are bands that fall within the hair band genre who have had success both before and after the end of the Hair Band Era -- which, as you undoubtedly recall, I have defined as July 25, 1980 to May 23, 1992 -- we will be limiting this list and its "success" metric to those dates.  Thus, to qualify for points under the scoring system above, an album, EP, single, or song must have either been released as a single or have been a song on an album that was released between July 25, 1980 to May 23, 1992.  So, if it was on an album released before May 23, 1992, but it wasn't released as a single until after, it counts.  Conversely, if it was released as a single after July 25, 1980, it counts even if it was on an album released before then.  This also includes live albums and compilations.  For groups that were around before the Hair Band Era and/or changed their sound to adapt to the Hair Band Era (Kiss, Heart, Scorpions, etc.), I am only including the albums/singles that fit within the hair band genre, in my own subjective opinion. 

So, I'll add up all the points for each band and artist, and then take the top ten highest-scoring acts.  Once those acts have been determined, I will choose what I believe to be the best (read: my favorite) noncharting song by each of those ten bands or artists.  To be clear, noncharting means did not appear in the Billboard Hot 100.

I'll even list out the charting positions for the bands and artists, in case you want to check my math -- not that I'm going to do the list over or anything.

1.  Van Halen - "Sinner's Swing!"
162 points
-Albums:  5, 3, 2, 1, 1, 1
-Singles:  12, 38, 1, 13, 13, 56, 3, 22, 22, 34, 5, 13, 35, 27, 55
Van Halen basically ruled the '80s, so it should come as no surprise that they are tops on this list.  Choosing a song was hard, though, as several of the songs I was going to choose had actually charted.  And then "Romeo Delight" -- maybe my favorite Van Halen song -- was on Women and Children First, which was released before the Hair Band Era (see above).  So, I am going with "Sinner's Swing!" off of 1981's Fair Warning.  Generally a darker album, Fair Warning is the only Van Halen album of the David Lee Roth or Sammy Hagar eras that didn't have a song to chart in the Billboard Hot 100.  Passing over "Unchained" was a tough decision for me because I love that song too, but I wen't with "Sinner's Swing!" because I think fewer people have heard it.  It's one of the many breakneck energetic deep cuts from the band's first six albums (i.e., the Roth era) -- like "Atomic Punk," "I'm The One," "Light Up The Sky," "Bottoms Up!," "Romeo Delight," "The Full Bug," and "Top Jimmy" -- that, for me, make Van Halen who they are, and that energy was never quite matched during the Hagar era.  "Sinner's Swing!" is raw, beautiful rock and roll by four guys who were reaching their prime.

2.  Def Leppard - "High 'n' Dry (Saturday Night)"
139 points
-Albums:  38, 2, 2, 1
-Singles:  12, 16, 28, 61, 80, 19, 10, 2, 1, 3, 12, 15, 36, 12, 34, 62
1981's High 'n' Dry album is, behind Hysteria, my favorite Def Leppard album.  It was the band's last before original guitarist Pete Willis would be kicked out of the band and replaced by Phil Collen, and it was the band's first collaboration with Mutt Lange as producer.  It certainly trended more towards their earlier NWOBHM sound than their later more polished hair band masterpieces (Pyromania, Hysteria, Adrenalize), and it produced no songs that charted on the Billboard Hot 100 (although a remixed version of "Bringin' On The Heartbreak" later hit #61 in 1984).  The title track is a hard-rocking song with swagger about getting drunk on a Saturday.  Hilariously, it was targeted by the PMRC in 1985 as one of the "Filthy Fifteen" because of its apparent references to alcohol.  On the flip side, it has also been named as #33 on VH1's list of the Greatest Metal Songs.

3.  Heart – "The Wolf"
125 points
-Albums:  1, 2, 3
-Singles:  10, 4, 1, 10, 54, 1, 7, 12, 49, 2, 23, 13, 64
I limited Heart to the Heart, Bad Animals, and Brigade albums, and even then, they came in third.  Basically, every song they released as a single between 1985 and 1990 charted.  This made it very difficult to come up with a song for this list, particularly as I am not as familiar with Heart's deep cuts as I am with other bands' deep cuts.  But alas, all it meant is that I had to do some research.  By research, of course, I mean listening to their noncharting tracks on Spotify.  Unsurprisingly, the noncharting songs on these albums are, for the most part, pretty solid.  I decided to go with "The Wolf" off of the self-titled 1985 album.  It's a snarling rocker with great vocals from Ann Wilson and, as always, great guitars from sister Nancy.  "The Wolf" appears to be the spiritual cousin of the band's hit "Barracuda."  Setting aside the animal analogies, "The Wolf" is also about some sexually harassive asshole man who thinks he's better than he is.  ("Barracuda" was written as a venomous diss song towards certain types of men in the record industry, after some d-bag asked Ann how her "lover" was, referring to her sister Nancy.)

4 (tie).  Bon Jovi - "Wild In The Streets"
114 points
-Albums:  43, 37, 1, 1
-Singles:  39, 48, 54, 69, 1, 1, 7, 1, 3, 1, 7, 9
I was surprised Bon Jovi wasn't a little bit higher on the list, but then again, most of their success came in the last three years of the '80s, so they just didn't have the volume that the top three had.  "Wild In The Streets" is the last song off of Slippery When Wet, and it's an uptempo, catchy song that could have very well charted had it been released as a single -- since pretty much everything that they released charted.

4 (tie).  Poison - "Look What The Cat Dragged In"
114 points
-Albums:  3, 2, 2
-Singles:  9, 50, 13, 6, 12, 1, 10, 3, 4, 38, 35
Poison had their fair share of success, and I decided to go with the title track off of their debut album.  "Look What The Cat Dragged In" is a gritty song about the sinful Sunset Strip lifestyle. That opening riff is pretty solid.  For whatever reason, when I was ten, I didn't bat an eye when Bret Michaels declared "I gotta girl to a left of me, a girl to my right / I know damn well I slept with both last night."

6.  Guns N' Roses - "Rocket Queen"
109 points
-Albums:  1, 2, 2, 1
-Singles:  7, 1, 5, 4, 93, 29, 10, 33, 3, 72
I've said it before, and I'll say it many times again:  "Rocket Queen" is, was, and always will be my favorite Guns N' Roses song.  For an in-depth analysis of the song and my love for it, click here.  If reading isn't your bag, then I don't know why you're here, but at least listen to the song below.

7.  Mötley Crüe - "Live Wire"
106 points
-Albums:  17, 6, 2, 1, 2
-Singles:  54, 90, 16, 89, 12, 83, 6, 27, 8, 19, 78, 63, 37
"Live Wire" was the perfect song to be the first track off of Mötley Crüe's 1981 debut album, Too Fast For Love.  It is three minutes of raw energy at a machine-gun pace, announcing to the world that there was a new band in town, ready to rule the world and take your women and drugs on the way. (Note that the video below is inverted. They aren't all normally left-handed.)

8.  AC/DC - "Shoot To Thrill"
73 points
-Albums:  4, 1, 15, 32, 12, 2, 33
-Singles:  35, 37, 44, 84, 23
It was a pretty sizeable dropoff in points from 7 to 8, but AC/DC was hurt by its lack of big singles.  Their albums always sold and charted well, though.  "Shoot To Thrill" is a fantastic track off of Back in Black.  You've likely heard it in commercials, and I think it's in Iron Man.

9 (tie).  Cinderella - "Take Me Back"
69 points
-Albums:  3, 10, 19
-Singles:  13, 66, 51, 12, 36, 20, 36, 44
I was glad to see Cinderella make the list because they are an underrated and underappreciated hair band -- definitely more on the bluesy side, especially in their later stuff.  1988's Long Cold Winter contained four charting songs, including three Top 40 songs, but somehow "Take Me Back" wasn't released as a single.  It is probably my favorite Cinderella song.  With it's slide guitar, it's catchy and it rocks, which as you have seen, is kind of a trend during the Hair Band Era.

9 (tie).  David Lee Roth - "Elephant Gun"
69 points
-Albums:  15, 4, 6, 18
-Singles:  3, 12, 16, 66, 85, 6, 64
After David Lee Roth and Van Halen split ways, Roth went solo and tried his damnedest to form a band with the same level of musical talent as the one he left behind.  He came pretty damn close, getting guitar legend Steve Vai, bass wunderkind Billy Sheehan (who would later go onto Mr. Big), and session drummer Gregg Bissonette to join him on his first two albums.  "Elephant Gun," off of Roth's debut full-length solo album, Eat 'Em and Smile," is a song that reminds me why I loved Roth with Van Halen.  It's fast, energetic, and has great musicianship.

Rocktober Hair Band Song #12: "Lay Your Hands On Me" by Bon Jovi

Twenty-nine years ago this week, Bon Jovi's fourth studio album, New Jersey, was beginning its four-week run as the #1 album on the Billboard album charts.  There was no let down for Bon Jovi after their prior breakthrough album, Slippery When Wet.  In addition to topping the U.S. album charts, New Jersey hit #1 on the album charts in five other countries and was Top 10 in another five.  It has gone platinum seven times in the U.S., and it holds the distinction of being the first American album every released in the USSR -- presumably leading to glastnost and the fall of the Soviet Union. 

New Jersey also spawned five Top 10 hits on the Billboard Hot 100 -- "Bad Medicine" (#1), "I'll Be There For You" (#1), "Born To Be My Baby" (#3), "Lay Your Hands On Me (#7), and "Living in Sin" (#9) -- which was (and still is) the most for a hard rock or hair band album.  While they're all great songs, I'm going with "Lay Your Hands On Me."  It's the opening track on the album and sets the stage nicely, fading in with Tico Torres's thunderous drum beats getting louder and louder, with the band shouting "hey!" every now and then, before the drums, guitar, and bass disappear and it's just Jon Bon Jovi repeating the song title behind a church organ, set to guide you on a religious experience for the next five minutes, because before you know it, bam!  The whole band kicks in and busts out a hard-rocking hit with a sing-along chorus, pleading you, begging you, commanding you to lay your hands on me.  You don't have to grab anything.  Just lay them on me.  That said, you're also welcome to grab something, if that's your thing.

The video is a classic concert video, showing you why arena rock concerts used to rule the world. If this song doesn't get you in a good mood, then maybe you're just one of those people who isn't capable of being put in a good mood. Take a look in the mirror and think about it for a good long time. No one likes a curmudgeon.

Monday, October 16, 2017

Rocktober Hair Band Song #11: "Wait" by White Lion

Danish/American rockers White Lion were one of the many successful "W" hair bands -- Warrant, Whitesnake, Winger, W.A.S.P., Great White, etc. -- that ruled the airwaves in the late '80s.  White Lion's debut single, "Wait," was released in June 1987, but didn't end up catching fire until about seven months later, when it hit #8 on the Billboard Hot 100.  The group's follow-up single, the ballad "When The Children Cry" did even better, getting up to #3.  Both songs helped the band's sophomore album, Pride, eventually go double platinum in the U.S.  

They made a few more albums, but never matched the success of Pride, breaking up in 1991.  Like so many bands, the members (or former members, depending on how you look at it) have unfortunately been involved in legal battles over who can use the White Lion name, so it doesn't look like we're going to get that reunion we've all been waiting for.

But we'll always have "Wait," won't we?  It's simply a pop metal masterpiece.  The guitars are great, the song is uptempo, it's catchy as hell, and it has a sing-along chorus.  What more could you want out of a hair band song?

Friday, October 13, 2017

Rocktober Hair Band Song #10: "I Can't Drive 55" by Sammy Hagar

Yesterday was Diamond Dave, and today it's the Red Rocker, who turns 70 today.  Of course, we all know Sammy Hagar replaced David Lee Roth as the lead singer of Van Halen.  I'm not here to debate the relative merits of Van Halen vs. Van Hagar, so calm down -- both lead singers just happened to have birthdays three days apart.  Hagar, of course, had a great solo career (in addition to his stint as lead singer of Montrose) prior to joining Van Halen.  I'm going with one of his classics, "I Can't Drive 55," which hit #26 on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1984.  I think anyone who has ever driven, maybe outside of people from Maine or Ohio, can relate to this song.  All I'm saying is that, if you're driving in the left lane on a highway in Maine or Ohio, don't be surprised if the car in front of you is going under the speed limit and is oblivious to the fact that he/she should move to the right lane to let you pass.  But I digress.  Here is the video.

Thursday, October 12, 2017

Rocktober Hair Band Song #9: "Just Like Paradise" by David Lee Roth

I don't have a ton of time to write today, but a couple of days ago was Bloomington, Indiana native David Lee Roth's 63rd birthday.  Here is his 1988 solo hit "Just Like Paradise," which topped out at #6 on the Billboard Hot 100.

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

Rocktober Hair Band Song #8: "Don't Treat Me Bad" by FireHouse

Charlotte-based FireHouse is another one of those bands that probably arrived on the hair band scene just a little too late.  But they did have some surprising success in the few years before grunge took the fun out of hard rock music.

They formed in 1989, and their eponymous debut album was released a year later.  It went to #21 on the Billboard album charts and eventually went double platinum.  The band followed that up with 1992's Hold Your Fire, which got up to #23 on the album charts, and 1995's 3, which topped out at #66.  The band did have seven songs that charted on the Billboard Hot 100, including two Top 10 power ballads -- Love of a Lifetime (#5) and "When I Look Into Your Eyes" (#8) -- and two other Top 40 songs -- "Don't Treat Me Bad" (#19) and "I Live My Life For You" (#26).  The band even won the Favorite Heavy Metal/Hard Rock New Artist award at the 1992 AMAs, beating out Nirvana and Alice in Chains for the honor.  And to top it off, as far as I know, no one in FireHouse ever died because of heroin.  Suck on that, grunge!

I'm going with "Don't Treat Me Bad" because it's the first FireHouse song I ever heard, likely because it was the first single they released and it was a Top 20 song.  It's catchy as all get up, building from that chuck-a-chuck acoustic guitar in first verse to the electric release in the chorus.  And let's not forget the message, which I think some of our politicians could stand to abide by these days:  you can do anything, but don't treat me bad.

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Tuesday Top Ten: Hair Band One Hit Wonders

Back in May 2014, I did a Tuesday Top Ten of Hair Band One Hit Wonders.  Because I'm somewhat busy today, I'm going to take on that topic again, although this time I'm going to take a little bit of a different approach this time and go with the ten highest-charting hair band one hit wonders, rather than my personal opinion on what the ten best hair band one hit wonders were.  Thus, this post will be similar to (and copy and paste much of) my previous post, but there will be a few differences -- most notably that I have removed Ratt's "Round and Round," since Ratt technically had two Top 40 songs.

As you know, I love hair band music, but my love is not limited to the Bon Jovis, Def Leppards, and Mötley Crües of the world.  The '80s were a bastion for one hit wonders, and the hair band genre had its share -- although not as many as you might think.

First, I think it's gravely important that we define what constitutes a one hit wonder.  It's a relatively fluid concept, but generally, a one hit wonder is a band or musician that had one and only one song that made it into the Top 40 of the Billboard Hot 100 charts.  I think that's a fair and objective standard.  In my mind, if Casey Kasem (or Shadoe Stevens) didn't play your song on American Top 40, you didn't have a hit.

This was actually much tougher than I expected.  There were a lot of bands who had multiple Top 40 hits who I only thought would have had one.  After all, hair bands were quite popular in the mid '80s through the early '90s.  Bands like Bad English (3), Cinderella (5), Damn Yankees (2), Europe (4), Extreme (2), FireHouse (4), Lita Ford (2), Great White (2), Mr. Big (3), Nelson (4), Quiet Riot (2), Ratt (2), Skid Row (2), Slaughter (3), Tesla (2), Warrant (5), White Lion (2), Whitesnake (4), Winger (3), Vixen (2) all made it into the Top 40 more than one, and several of them had multiple Top 10s at that.  Who knew Vixen had two Top 40 hits, other than, say, the members of Vixen?

And, on the other hand, there were a lot of bands who I thought would have had a Top 40 song that had none, but perhaps I am retroactively overvaluing the popularity of the likes of W.A.S.P., Dokken, Dio, Britny Fox, Jackyl, and BulletBoys.

As a result of these issues, I had to fudge a couple of the entries on the list and expand my scope to the Top 50.  With that, here are the top ten hair band one hit wonders, in reverse order by highest chart position on the Billboard Hot 100, with the song's highest peak on the charts in parentheses.  And, of course, following each song is the video because you couldn't have a hit song in the '80s without a video.

Just missed:  "Bang Bang" by Danger Danger (#49); "Wait For You" by Bonham (#55); "Hey You" by The Quireboys (#53)

10.  "Fly High Michelle" by Enuff Z'Nuff (#47)
Enuff Z'Nuff was an Illinois-based glam band that often sounded more Beatles-influenced than metal-influenced.  A friend of mine that I grew up with claimed at one point that the band's drummer grew up on his block, and I have no reason to believe or not believe that.  "Fly High Michelle" was the band's biggest hit, topping out at #47 in 1990.  It's the only song on the list that didn't crack the Top 40.

9.  "The Ballad of Jayne" by L.A. Guns (#33)
The original incarnation of L.A. Guns has the infamous distinction of being the "Guns" in Guns N' Roses, when L.A. Guns (featuring Tracii Guns) merged with Hollywood Rose (featuring Axl Rose, Duff McKagan, and Izzy Stradlin).  Of course, Guns was replaced in GNR by Slash, and then he reformed L.A. Guns shortly thereafter.  They put out a couple pretty good glam/sleaze metal albums that cracked the Top 50 of Billboard's album charts, and like so many other hair bands on this list, their highest-charting song was their ballad, appropriately titled "The Ballad of Jayne."  I have always liked this song, and for one reason or another, I think it's better than most hair band ballads.

8.  "Turn Up the Radio" by Autograph (#29)
"Turn Up the Radio" is a great, fist-pumping song with a sing-along chorus, and as I learned today, guitarist Steve Lynch won 1985's "Guitar Solo of the Year" award from Guitar Player Magazine for this song.  I used to see this video now and then on VH1 Classic's hard rock and metal video show, Metal Mania (RIP, VH1 Classic), as well as the band's video for their song "Blondes in Black Cars," a song that could only have been made in the '80s.

7.  "House of Pain" by Faster Pussycat (#28)
Faster Pussycat was fronted by Taime Downe, who co-owned the '80s Sunset Strip club The Cathouse with Riki Rachtman (of MTV Headbangers Ball fame), and "House of Pain" was the band's only charting single.  It's a heartfelt power ballad.

6.  "Honestly" by Stryper (#23)
Who says glam metal can't include some Jesus loving?  Stryper was, as far as I know, the only Christian hair band that had any measure of success.  "Honestly," off the band's 1987 platinum-selling album To Hell With The Devil, was their highest-charting song, and it is a pretty sappy ballad.  I much prefer the title track, but "Honestly" does provide at least a glimpse into lead singer Michael Sweet's vocal range.

5.  "We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister (#21)
Give how ubiquitous "We're Not Gonna Take It" has become over the years (I think most college pep bands have had this in their regular rotation at some point), I sometimes forget that it was Twisted Sister's only Top 40 hit.  This is not only a top hair band one hit wonder, but has been ranked as the #21 overall one hit wonder of all-time by VH1.  The video is also a classic that my kids now love to watch. Neidermeyer: what a dick.

4.  "I'll Never Let You Go" by Steelheart (#14)
This was the only one hit wonder that made my list of Top Ten Hair Band Power Ballads, and with good reason.   Lead singer Miljenko "Michael" Matijevic hits notes that most female opera singers can only dream about.  Matijevic also provided the vocals for Mark Wahlberg's character in the 2001 guilty pleasure film Rock Star, which I could watch a thousand times and not get sick of.

3.  "Love Is On The Way" by Saigon Kick (#12)
I have always assumed Saigon Kick is a hair band, based on the fact that their only hit, "Love Is On The Way" was a ballad in the style of other hair bands' ballads at the time.  Then again, the extent of my knowledge of Saigon Kick is relatively limited.  Anyway, this song was pretty big, reaching #12 on the charts in 1992, at the tail end of the Hair Band Era.

2.  "Don't Close Your Eyes" by Kix (#11)
Baltimore-based Kix struck a chord (pun intended) in 1989 with their anti-suicide power ballad "Don't Close Your Eyes."  Like many hair bands (see also Extreme and Mr. Big), they are unfortunately and unfairly mainly known for their ballad, but most of their stuff is a lot harder rocking.  While I have never seen Kix live, they are apparently a legendarily good live band, so if you get the chance, check them out.

1.  "Silent Lucidity" by Queensrÿche (#9)
When I made my original list, honestly, I didn't even think about Queensrÿche because I assumed they had more than one Top 40 song. Apparently, I put too much faith in "Jet City Woman." But "Silent Lucidity" was the band's only charting single -- and the highest-charting hair band one hit wonder.

Rocktober Hair Band Song #7: "Here I Go Again" by Whitesnake

Thirty years ago today, Whitesnake topped the Billboard Hot 100 with their anthem "Here I Go Again."  The song has a pretty interesting history.  Originally, it was released on the band's 1982 album, Saints and Sinners.  The 1982 version featured lead singer David Coverdale's former Deep Purple bandmates John Lord on keyboards and Ian Paice on drums (and some other different personnel).  While the song is generally the same, there are a few differences in the arrangement, and in the chorus, it was "like a hobo I was born to walk alone," rather than "like a drifter I was born to walk alone."  It was a minor hit in the UK (reaching #34 on the UK pop charts), but didn't make any noise on the American charts.

In 1987, the band (with an entirely new lineup, save Coverdale) re-recorded the song for their self-titled album, which was released in April that year.  The new version was a little harder hitting, in the chorus anyway.  Also, Coverdale changed "hobo" to "drifter" because he was afraid people might mistake "hobo" for "homo," which seems like a progressive thought at the time -- and frankly, "drifter" sounds better in the song.  This is the most popular version, and the one that hit #1 in the U.S. and Canada, and was Top 10 in several other countries (#5 in The Netherlands, #7 in Ireland, and #9 in the UK) and ended up being the #7 song on Billboard's year-end chart for 1987.

You may occasionally hear "Here I Go Again" on the radio and think to yourself that it sounds a little off.  You'd be right.  Don't ever fucking doubt yourself.  You see, in addition to the album version, the band (with a couple more lineup changes) also recorded a "radio mix" of the song in 1987.  The radio mix is a little heavy on the keyboards, if you ask me.  It almost sounds like Heart trying to cover Whitesnake.

There's only one version of the song that features Tawny Kitaen doing gymnastics on the hoods of two Jaguars, and that's the album version from 1987.  Kitaen, of course, would later be featured in the video for the band's follow-up single, "Is This Love" (which hit #2 in the U.S.), before marrying Coverdale, before having an affair with OJ Simpson while he was still married to Nicole Brown, before divorcing Coverdale, before making an appearance on the "Nose Job" episode of Seinfeld as Jerry's sexy airhead actress girlfriend, before replacing Arleen Sorkin as Dave Coulier's co-host of America's Funniest People, before marrying major league pitcher Chuck Finley, before she was arrested for domestic battery after she repeated kicked Finley in the face with high heels and then stabbed him in the leg with her high heels, before going on Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew.

Monday, October 09, 2017

Midwestern Eavesdropping

Fortysomething male to several friends:  "Apparently Milton Berle has a huge dick."  (pauses, as everyone looks at him confusingly) "Am I the only one who knows this?"

Rocktober Hair Band Song #6: "Down Boys" by Warrant

Warrant probably came along about two years too late.  Their 1989 debut album Dirty Rotten Filthy Stinking Rich and their follow up the next year, Cherry Pie, were both great albums.  The band may have been able to squeeze a third big album out of the Hair Band Era if they had been around a little earlier, but alas, we cannot choose when the Sunset Strip calls us.

The band's first nine singles charted on the Billboard Hot 100, with three top 10 songs ("Heaven" (#2), "Cherry Pie" (#10), and "I Saw Red" (#10)) another two Top 40 songs ("Down Boys (#27) and "Sometimes She Cries" (#20)).  In addition to these, both of their first two albums were chock full of catchy hard rock songs.

I'm going with Warrant's debut single, "Down Boys" because, even 28 years later, it's my favorite Warrant song.  That's about all I have to say right now.