Thursday Texts - 8/4/11

As usual, I've been stockpiling:

917: There's a woman on my green line train that looks like ozzy ozbourne.

517: Sperm blister

312: Hey what's going down?
937: Nothing. Just drinkin'. Got a night out. You are cordially invited to join us
312: I will be putting on some pants and head over.

773: Should I sing Eve of Destruction by Barry McGuire at karaoke?

937: HAPPY BIRTHDAY DOUGIE, would you like to teach me how to DOUGIE??
937 (2): I think you have the wrong number

937: HAPPY BIRTHDAY DOUG
937 (2): Thanks, but my name's not Doug and it's not my birthday

773: OH YEAHHHHHHHHHH? OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
937: Too soon
773: No such animal
937: That's the truth. I hope The Genius is coping with this all right
773: Elizabeth is inconsolable
937: I'm pretty sure she's been dead for a while
773: That explains her lack of a statement

517: Just saw ponch at the airport.

937: Pirates in first place is sign of apocalypse. Mayans were late by one year

937: I wanna pee in your food

517: All of my Amy Winehouse collectibles just doubled in value

Thanks to everyone who sent stuff in. As I said in the initial Thursday Texts post, I invite you to email hilarious texts that you send or receive to gmyhblog@yahoo.com, and I will post them accordingly. All texts will be anonymous, identified only by their area code. Or, I also strongly encourage people to post texts as comments to the Thursday Text posts. I will not approve any comments that contain last names. I love you all.