Midwestern Eavesdropping - 2/26/09

Twentysomething female watching Indiana/Purdue basketball game, after shot of Purdue student section: "Usually you have to be addicted to meth to be that ugly."
--Chicago
Eavesdropper: GMYH

Twentysomething special ed teacher: "I got MILKED and FISTED on the same day."
--Chicago
Eavesdropper: The Loose-Lipped Lithuanian

Drunk twentysomething female: "I want to be the Governor of Chicago."
--Chicago, Glascott's, Halsted & Webster
Eavesdropper: AlyK

While discussing a "woman" with huge fake breasts:
Drunk guy #1: "That's definitely a man."
Drunk Guy #2: "Then I would suck the shit out of that guy's tits."
--Ft. Lauderdale, a bar
Eavesdropper: RDC

Drunk female #1: "What did you spill?"
Drunk female #2: "Beer & tequila."
Drunk female #1: "Oh, I think that's called beerquila. Wait, I'm not sure."
--Chicago, Glascott's, Halsted & Webster
Eavesdropper: The Loose-Lipped Lithuanian

Twentysomething Indiana fan during halftime of Indiana/Illinois game, when Indiana was down 17: "If we come back to make this close, I will literally eat my hat."
--Chicago
Eavesdropper: GMYH

Twentysomething teacher: "I like people dodging with my car, especially in the spring. It's like playing Frogger with real people."
--Chicago
Eavesdropper: The Loose-Lipped Lithuanian

Twentysomething female Indiana alum at an IU Alumni Association function, to a couple fellow IU grads: "What've you heard about Brand? Is he dead yet?"
--Chicago, Rocks, 1301 W. Schubert
Eavesdropper: GMYH

Drunk twentysomething female discussing a plastic hammerhead shark hanging from ceiling above a bar: "I'm going to ride it. I will ride with one hand on one fin and one hand on the other fin."
--Chicago, Glascott's, Halsted & Webster
Eavesdropper: The Loose-Lipped Lithuanian

Thanks to everyone who contributed. As always, when you overhear something hilarious, email it to gmyhblog@yahoo.com for inclusion in the next Midwestern Eavesdropping.