VOTE!

I don't care who you vote for (that's a lie -- vote Sarkozy), but you don't have any room to complain about your elected officials if you yourself do not vote. So get out there tomorrow and rock that shit.

There is one race I am especially fervent about, and that is the race for the Board of Commissioners of the Metropolitan Water Reclamation District of Greater Chicago, an agency that serves Chicago and 125 suburbs. When you fill out your ballot, there are probably going to be a lot of names you don't recognize running for the Board, and that's why I'm advocating one person who is NOT on the ballot: Ryan "Pissed Off" Christoff. Who would you rather have reclaim your water, some heliocentrist from Winnetka who drinks water out of a bottle or some guy you know is pissed off? I know where I stand. After garnering at least one write-in vote in 2006, Christoff -- a political outsider with a limited understanding of government, who resists the kind of party politics that have plagued 100 E. Erie for the last 119 years -- is primed to triple, if not quadruple, that total this time around. So when you go to the polls tomorrow, remember to write in Ryan "Pissed Off" Christoff for Metropolitan Water Reclamation District Board. Our unreclaimed water deserves nothing less.

UPDATE: There are not write-in lines on the paper ballot in Chicago. Make sure you ask your polling place judge how to write in someone who belongs on the Water Reclamation Board. Do not be silenced!