The Easter Bunny Hates You

Special thanks go out to the man they once called Joey Bates for sending me the link to this video entitled "The Easter Bunny Hates You." It's under 2 minutes, and I think it reaches out to people on several levels. My favorite parts are when the Easter Bunny beats some guys with a sock full of pool balls and when the Easter Bunny knocks the ice cream cone out of the guy's hand.

The fact that this video has found its way to me is not surprising. In the back of my mind, I knew this day would come. You see, back in the salad days, I was part of one of the longest running and most wildly successful talk shows in West Central Cable Commission (read: cable access for Chicago's near Western suburbs) history -- a show by the name of The Better Half of 60 Minutes (Season 1 should be out on DVD by June 2013). In one particularly forgettable skit, I played a crazed redneck who attempted to assassinate the Easter Bunny, Lee Harvey Oswald style from a building while the Easter Bunny was in a parade. We received a lot of criticism from the religious right, but the way I figured it, I was just striking down a false idol. And also, it'll be a cold day in hell before I bow to the wishes of Jesus freaks. Needless to say, the show went off without a hitch. Or so I thought. It looks like that fucking bunny can take a bullet.