As you may know, I'm a giant nerd, so it should come as no surprise that I'm following the IHSA tennis meet (my high school usually does decently). In scanning the results for the past day, I have come across some pretty awesome names -- names that no high schooler should have. Apparently some parents in 1990-1993 were pretty big assholes. I am too, so I figured I should post some of the better names in this year's tournament. Here you go:
-Igor Federov, who I assume doesn't smile and "must break you."
-Bobber Nelson
-Patrick "Dropping the" Hammers
-Gautham Oroskar, aka "Batman"
-Austin "Kanga" Roos
-Colby "The" Clapper
-Augie Bloom, who I assume is a 70-year-old Jewish man whose bursitis acts up now and then
-Max Vest
-Hemanth Sirandas, aka "Master of the Universe"
-Gentry Nordstrom
-Phil Ramsbottom - I bet he does.
-Brantner Jones - Soon-to-be-father in 1992: "Muffy, should we name our kid Brant or Vintner?" Soon-to-be-mother: "I know, Chad, why not combine the two?!" Soon-to-be-father: "Superb."
-Rustam "About to go in-" Saini
-Spenser Kockler - "Kockler? I don't even know 'er!"
And the best one of all: Skeeter Plowman
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