I like grocery stores. Filling my cart with a whole bunch of food that I know is just going to spoil in the back of my fridge makes me feel like I've accomplished something in life. I'm indifferent to opera music. Once in high school I was dragged to an opera (in Detroit, no less), despite my repeated vocal protests ("Oh good, non-rock and roll music in a foreign language in downtown Detroit. And I get to wear a suit!"). It turned out to be quite refreshing, as I slept throught most it.
Never in my vivid nightmares did I think grocery stores and opera music could or should be combined. Today, I was out cruising with the family, hurling drive-by insults at pretty much every white person we saw. Last week, Jester went to a newly opened grocery store, Mariano's at Western and Rocsoe, and she had good things to say about it. We were in the neighborhood and needed some groceries, so we decided to give Mariano's a whirl.
When you go to a grocery store, you expect to hear some music -- maybe some muzak, light rock, adult contemporary, or oldies. Whatever it is, you usually don't notice it, and it's not intrusive.
Walking up, we could hear some opera singing and didn't think much of it. In the doorway, it got really loud, and we figured it was just some rogue speakers. Then we walked into the store, and it turned out to a live female opera singer. To say that it was offensively loud is an understatement. We were about to put the girls into a shopping cart, but instead we went outside to look at pumpkins in hopes that the caterwauling would end soon. It didn't. It only got louder and more obnoxious, so we just went home without buying anything.
I didn't think I had the capacity to hate a grocery store. I was wrong. I now hate grocery stores with live opera music.
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