OC? O Yeah

So the season premier of The OC was last night. It was okay, and frankly, it resolved more than it should have in one episode. But rather than worry about what was resolved, perhaps we need to worry about several interesting questions left unanswered:
1. What's Jeri Ryan's character up to? What's her ulterior motive? Is it to get it on with Kirsten (man I hope so)? Or is it to steal Kirsten's identity? I don't trust her. She's got shifty eyes. (And yes, it's the same Jeri Ryan who is the ex-wife of former Illinois Gov. Jack Ryan, who took sweet, innocent Jeri to several sex clubs in Paris, the revelation of which cost Jack his chance to get destroyed by Barack Obama in last November's Senate race in Illinois)
2. Will Ryan (Atwood, not Jeri Ryan) continue to do awesomely bad impressions of Summer? Holy shit, that was hilarious, and I don't think it was meant to be.
3. Will Ryan and Marissa really be expelled from Harbor Academy? If so, how many asses will Ryan kick defending Marissa's honor in public school?
4. When will Teresa and R.J. (Ryan, Jr.) enter the picture? I'm hoping it's not until the season finale, right before Ryan is about to head to some prestigious college that Sandy somehow got Ryan into. The man may leave Chino, but Chino will never leave the man.
5. How big will Sandy let his eyebrows get before Kirsten returns from rehab?
6. When will Kirsten return from rehab? And when she does, how long before she gets hammered on straight vodka at 7am?
7. When will Oliver and Trey team up and come back for a cocaine-induced shooting spree?
8. How much money will Caleb leave to Julie? My guess (and hope) is none, so that she has to go back to making stag films.
9. Where's that saucy little tart of a coke whore, Jess? My guess (and hope) is that she's banging some street tough for coke.

I also watched the new show Reunion, which I wouldn't have watched unless it was on right after The OC, but the TV often makes me do things I otherwise wouldn't. Reunion was okay. The concept is pretty good. It starts at someone's funeral in the present day. All you know is that it's one of six friends who graduated from high school in 1986. Then each episode tracks those six friends throughout the years, with each episode representing a different year, starting with 1986. The acting was less than spectacular and, of the people in the scenes that took place in the supposed '80s, only about 17% were actually wearing '80s-style clothes. Most of them just looked like gypsys (I know Carmela would NOT have approved--see the "Back from the Land of the Dead" post below). Props, though, to Craig (great '80s prep name), the guy who only wore popped collars. As if every preppy douche needed more of an excuse to do that today. If only Craig had on a slightly tilted trucker hat with a clever phrase on it.

Well, I'm off to Indy and B-town in a few hours. Gooday.