Well, this weekend was pleasant, wasn't it? Well, I guess it was if you're a Colts, Pats, Bears, or Saints fan, but not so much if you're a Ravens, Chargers, Seahawks, or Eagles fan, or if you were once a high-ranking Baath official who helped order and carry out murder and torture in a small Northern Iraq town in 1982. Luckily, I am a Bears fan, and my role in the Dujail massacre was extremely limited.
Friday was turbo insane. After work, Jester and I headed to Kirkwood Bar & Grill (again, the new IU bar in town) for a meal of food. Meeting us there were the likes of Ryan "Pissed Off" Christoff, Tradd "Good-Natured" Fromme, and Kara "Generally Agreeable" Madrin. All of us were extremely excited because none of us had eaten there yet. To take the edge off, we shared a few syringes full of the good stuff (right in the middle of the restaurant!) and ordered some ale. Our waitress seemed a bit ornery, snapping at Ryan for ordering mini-sandwiches by their designated numbers on the menu rather than by their given names. "That doesn't help me!" she squealed. I had to hold Jessie back from shattering her glass on our waitress's head. Tradd was visibly shaken.
The meal itself was pretty good. I had chicken tortilla soup, which I highly recommend for those of you who like eating. Like Ryan, I ordered the mini-sandwiches. Explaining that I was gravely concerned that I was coming down with a case of microcytic anemia, I went with the mini steak sandwich, the mini French dip, and the mini cheeseburger. All were good, although I thought there was too much bun.
Later in the evening, Ryan coaxed Jester and me into joining him at Lawry's, a local dram shop, for a pint or two. Pittsburgh's own Iron City Beer was on special for $2.50 a bottle. I found this to be hilariously ironic, given my recently fabricated iron deficiency. While there, we not only saw Ryan, his special (?) ladyfriend, her roommate, and Dan Weeser*, but also the Stickrods. Conversations were had, beers were consumed, and memories were made.
Saturday morning I awoke at 11 a.m., since the IU/Penn State game tipped off at 11:17 (not even kidding). Ryan and Tradd came over, and we all enjoyed some ginger beer and a good cry. After a sluggish first 30 minutes in Happy Valley, the Hoosiers pulled away for a ten-point victory.
Saturday night, it was the birthday celebration of Jake "Nobilitay" Noble at Southport Lanes, which is a delightful little bowling alley on Southport (as you may have guessed). And I do mean little. It only has four lanes, but that's not what makes it special. What makes Southport Lanes special is the fact that it still has pin monkeys. A pin monkey, as you may recall, was Homer Simpson's favorite job, and it's basically a guy who stands behind the pins (on the lane next to the lane that is being used) and manually resets the pins and clears the ones are knocked down. The trick with these guys is that you put some money in one of the holes and roll it down, in exchange for the pin monkeys taking liberties with the pins. Chambers, who was drunk of his own sense of self-righteousness and beer, put a twenty in the hole in about the 3rd frame and rolled nothing but strikes for the rest of the game.
While the whole pin monkey/tipping thing was cute -- although I prefer to win sans the help of a cane -- our waitress was a bit of an off-putting
bitch with a Steve Perry haircut and an inability to smile, whose body language, facial expressions, tone of voice, and attitude suggested that being a waitress at Southport Lanes is not a part of her life plan. I guess I would be pissed off too if I had a haircut like that. I took both of these photos of her with my camera phone. Her vocal range was worse than expected.
Friday was turbo insane. After work, Jester and I headed to Kirkwood Bar & Grill (again, the new IU bar in town) for a meal of food. Meeting us there were the likes of Ryan "Pissed Off" Christoff, Tradd "Good-Natured" Fromme, and Kara "Generally Agreeable" Madrin. All of us were extremely excited because none of us had eaten there yet. To take the edge off, we shared a few syringes full of the good stuff (right in the middle of the restaurant!) and ordered some ale. Our waitress seemed a bit ornery, snapping at Ryan for ordering mini-sandwiches by their designated numbers on the menu rather than by their given names. "That doesn't help me!" she squealed. I had to hold Jessie back from shattering her glass on our waitress's head. Tradd was visibly shaken.
The meal itself was pretty good. I had chicken tortilla soup, which I highly recommend for those of you who like eating. Like Ryan, I ordered the mini-sandwiches. Explaining that I was gravely concerned that I was coming down with a case of microcytic anemia, I went with the mini steak sandwich, the mini French dip, and the mini cheeseburger. All were good, although I thought there was too much bun.
Later in the evening, Ryan coaxed Jester and me into joining him at Lawry's, a local dram shop, for a pint or two. Pittsburgh's own Iron City Beer was on special for $2.50 a bottle. I found this to be hilariously ironic, given my recently fabricated iron deficiency. While there, we not only saw Ryan, his special (?) ladyfriend, her roommate, and Dan Weeser*, but also the Stickrods. Conversations were had, beers were consumed, and memories were made.
Saturday morning I awoke at 11 a.m., since the IU/Penn State game tipped off at 11:17 (not even kidding). Ryan and Tradd came over, and we all enjoyed some ginger beer and a good cry. After a sluggish first 30 minutes in Happy Valley, the Hoosiers pulled away for a ten-point victory.
Saturday night, it was the birthday celebration of Jake "Nobilitay" Noble at Southport Lanes, which is a delightful little bowling alley on Southport (as you may have guessed). And I do mean little. It only has four lanes, but that's not what makes it special. What makes Southport Lanes special is the fact that it still has pin monkeys. A pin monkey, as you may recall, was Homer Simpson's favorite job, and it's basically a guy who stands behind the pins (on the lane next to the lane that is being used) and manually resets the pins and clears the ones are knocked down. The trick with these guys is that you put some money in one of the holes and roll it down, in exchange for the pin monkeys taking liberties with the pins. Chambers, who was drunk of his own sense of self-righteousness and beer, put a twenty in the hole in about the 3rd frame and rolled nothing but strikes for the rest of the game.
While the whole pin monkey/tipping thing was cute -- although I prefer to win sans the help of a cane -- our waitress was a bit of an off-putting
bitch with a Steve Perry haircut and an inability to smile, whose body language, facial expressions, tone of voice, and attitude suggested that being a waitress at Southport Lanes is not a part of her life plan. I guess I would be pissed off too if I had a haircut like that. I took both of these photos of her with my camera phone. Her vocal range was worse than expected.After Southport Lanes, Jester and I went to Mulligan's in Roscoe Village to meet Bohmann and friends for more ale, but this time with fewer chicks that looked like former members of Journey (excluding the chick in the corner who looked like Gregg Rolie).
On Sunday, my beautiful, talented, and genuinely likeable wife and I went to Christoff's to watch the Bears game. Also there were his special (?) ladyfriend, Tim Weeser*, and Dan and Noreen (not to be confused with the high-talker and girlfriend of the same names from Seinfeld), and near the end of the game the familiar and loveable face of Tradd mad an appearance. While we all nearly had a collective heart attack during the game, the Bears pulled it out. Aside from a fumble, Grossman had a decent game. Hopefully this will get the Bears over the hump, allowing them to dash the hopes and dreams of a city still recovering from the worst natural disaster in American history.
On Sunday, my beautiful, talented, and genuinely likeable wife and I went to Christoff's to watch the Bears game. Also there were his special (?) ladyfriend, Tim Weeser*, and Dan and Noreen (not to be confused with the high-talker and girlfriend of the same names from Seinfeld), and near the end of the game the familiar and loveable face of Tradd mad an appearance. While we all nearly had a collective heart attack during the game, the Bears pulled it out. Aside from a fumble, Grossman had a decent game. Hopefully this will get the Bears over the hump, allowing them to dash the hopes and dreams of a city still recovering from the worst natural disaster in American history.
My next class in the Second City writing program started last night, which means I got to miss the second half of the Pats/Chargers game. It's weird because according to the media, the Chargers had already won the Super Bowl before the game started. Unfortunately the Pats' victory ensures that we'll have to hear about how good Tom fucking Brady is in the playoffs for another week, as well as how unbelievably far inside Peyton Manning's head that Bill Belichick is. On top of that, we get to hear about Hurricane Katrina (did you know that it hit New Orleans and that the Superdome was closed for a whole season?) and Grossman. I'll be steering clear of ESPN this week.
Have a great week. I love you all.
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